Rinse and Repeat
by Minikimii
Summary: It had always been the same; Roxas would come to his window in the middle of the night, crying, and Hayner would be the one to comfort him in ways not even his boyfriend could manage. But now Roxas was gone and that left Hayner all alone... right? Seiner
1. Abandoned

Disclaimer: KH is not mine.  
Interstingly, this fic was inspired by the first stanza of Disturbia by Rihanna. It's not a songfic though. Let's just make that clear. :)

Yeah, I know I'm starting a new story while I've got four other fics on my plate, but this story just popped into my head and wouldn't go away. -sigh- It's like suicide to be juggling fics like this. D:

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Abandoned

It had always been the same. Roxas would come to his window in the middle of the night, crying. Sometimes it was the dreams, sometimes it was the parents, sometimes it was the homophobes, but most times it was all three of the things put together.

And that was what would scare Hayner most of all. Always around three a.m., the frightened blond would climb up to his second story window and rap gently on the glass with his frigid and often bruised hands. Hayner would wake up obediently and slide the window open, allowing for a scared Roxas to climb in and into his bed for the night. Even though they had once entertained one another with curious midnight touches and experimenting, they weren't lovers. That much was clear, but they were at the very least best friends. The shared knowledge that they needed each other was always enough to keep this tradition of comfort alive.

At least, until Roxas had upped and left with Axel at the beginning of summer break only three days ago. Being the only two out-of-the-closet gays in the town had been too much to handle and the couple had left without so much as a goodbye to their family and a few hastily written notes to friends saying that they would meet again some day.

Hayner was counting on that 'someday'.

_What's wrong with me?  
_

Somewhere inside, a part of the boy knew that Roxas was never coming back. Even though they had forged a more than brotherly bond, it obviously wasn't strong enough to keep Roxas grounded in Hayner's life. Who in their right mind would return to a place like this that held so many painful memories of rejection and abuse by the very people who gave you life and were supposed to love you? But, being Hayner, he looked at the silver lining until it blinded him.

That was why the blond didn't given it a second thought when about fifteen minutes past three a series of gentle raps sounded at his window. Not stopping to check and see who it was (a habit he had long grown out of in the dead of the night), he simply threw open the sliding glass and retreated to the warm comforts of his bed without a word.

He had to admit (albeit reluctantly) that what happened next truly did startle him. Instead of the usual suspect that came stumbling through the windowsill and onto his floor, a different kind of person stepped onto his carpet and into his room tonight. It was only after the window had shut when Hayner realized how much of an idiot he had been.

"What's wrong, chickenwuss? Expecting your little Roxas to show up?"

Seifer.

There was certainly something off about the way he presented himself as he made his way, almost with familiarity, across Hayner's room. Without his white sleeve-less trench coat and beloved beanie, without his other two-thirds Seifer was more... human.

Normally, Hayner would probably burst out into an angry fit, maybe throw the intruder a few name calls and punches back just 'cause. Instead, he laid down in the bed and sighed off. What was he thinking when he opened the window? That Roxas had come back to say goodbye to him personally before he disappeared for good with his redheaded lover?

No, no one was that hopelessly naive.

"Fuck off, S'fer," he murmured, not caring about the way he sounded as he buried his face into the blanket he had scrunched up against his face.

It just wasn't fair for Roxas to leave him like this. They were supposed to be best friends. It was the understood law of their group of four. Olette and Pence were obviously going to get married and have seventy-eight children someday, so it was just natural that Roxas and Hayner stuck together. Even when Roxas had come out to the group and snagged himself the sexy redhead from his ceramics class for a boyfriend, it had still been Roxas and Hayner. Just them.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

His voice cracked, but he didn't care. Fuck whatever it was that Seifer wanted. He had lost Roxas. His Roxas; the one that made him smile, the one whose body he had know so much better than Axel had for years before they had gotten together. Roxas was the one that kept his sexuality a secret when he had finally realized who he was, and not because Hayner asked, but because he felt it was the right thing to do. Even if Axel had him now, that didn't mean that Hayner would stop feeling the near dormant attraction he'd developed for his best friend so long ago, shoved inside a box whose lid had been taken when Roxas had left.

"Saw the little blond lamer stumble through here a few times in the dead of the night. Figured you might need some company."

No part of him wanted to fight. Instead, he felt the buds for the wish of a hopeful patch between two high school rivals begin to work its way down into his chest. The mere thought of having the thought made him uncomfortable. He was too weak right now to be thinking coherently. At least he wasn't incoherent and passive enough to disengage that train before it broke out of the dark tunnel of his mouth, through his lips, and out into the open air.

_Why do I feel like this?_

Perhaps loneliness did this to people, for he wanted to grapple onto anything that could offer the comfort and stability he lacked. Unfortunately, Seifer was the only thing he'd spoken to in two days. His fist clenched into the pillow tighter, his nails digging into his palm through the thin cloth of the plush comfort. He missed Roxas too much already and that was an obvious answer within itself, seeing as how he'd locked himself in his house for the past two days when he'd discovered that Roxas was gone. Apparently loneliness made him desperate. To even think that Seifer could even be friendly toward him... damn, he really was missing his fight.

"Why do you care?"

Seifer sat down on the couch in Hayner's room, draping his bare arms across the couch's back cushion and watching the laying form intently from where he sat. Hayner waited for a response, his fisted clutch on the pillow relaxing as he pressed his puffy, tear-stained eyes to the green and black cotton.

"Nothing wrong with checking out the status of my competition, right?"

An angry flare lit in Hayner's chest but quickly disintegrated as he realized he was getting mad for the wrong reason. Mad because Seifer hadn't actually given a damn about his well-being but rather only how well he would be to fight? Seifer was just here to check on him for his own selfish reasons. Fuck that. Fuck Seifer.

"Well, you're done checking. Leave."

His voice cracked at the end of the command, but he didn't care. He didn't have enough left in him to care.

"Yeah, sure, lamer. I'm going to just leave now because you're obviously all rainbows and sunshine on this fine Saturday morning."

"Suit yourself," Hayner scowled into the bedsheets, not particularly giving a damn about the fact that his worst enemy was standing in his bedroom while he turned his back, completely exposed, open to the physically damaging potential only Seifer held.

Thoughts of his spiky-haired former best friend drifted to and fro across his mind. Wishing, wanting, waiting - it was all Hayner was good at.

Skin against cloth, Hayner could hear the teen behind him shifting in the couch sans sigh. Even the way he breathed when he smirked was missing. He squeezed his eyes shut, not wanting to hear, to feel, to think, _to experience_. Darkness was preferable to anything, everything. Because nothingness, the sincerity of absolute loneliness and fragility was all he could feel, all he could not feel; the pounding of the unabashed presence of another human being for the first time in three days was noticeable but ignored.

The garish green glow of digital numbers displayed on his ceiling flashed the hours by, one by two by three by four... Four hours and there were only two left to pass before sunrise.

"Are you going to leave any time soon?" he muttered out into the still, morning air.

Another rustle of skin meeting cloth, of stiff joints finally moving in the even more stagnant morning air, reprieve for their long-held position for the restful benefit of another's. Lacking attention, lacking the passionate flame for a fight, what could have easily morphed into tearing words that left unbearable, searing pain became something of a plead. Perhaps begging for some sort of healing forgiveness? Every undertone carried its own melodious note, their expressions unique and uniform.

"No," came the hushed reply, gentle, tender, sincere; the kind of response only a lover could give.

Only a lover.

It was almost enough to fool Hayner. Almost, because Seifer was just here to check up on the status of the competition. There was no 'caring' beneath the action. Just selfish concern for Seifer's own violent needs. Barred anger fought beneath the surface of his mind trying its best not to be drowned out by the endless images of Roxas.

_I'm going crazy now. _

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So I'm starting a new fic because I can't help it. I hope you guys liked it well enough so far. Tell me what you think! :)

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	2. Without Who?

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Without Who?

When he woke up, Seifer was gone.

Hayner would have loved to say that he didn't mind, that he didn't remember or care, but proof of the night before lay on him in his bed. Hayner knew he kicked off his sheets in his sleep whenever he went to bed angry or depressed. Nightmares usually called for a morning of waking up cold and drenched in sweat. Sometimes, he even ended up on the floor, but this morning, draped over his body was the white trench coat his nemesis had always worn through every one of their out of the Struggle rings matches out in the Sandlot.

His joints were stiff and almost creaked as he lifted himself off the bed. A film of heavy but dry tears coated his face, making it hard not to begin crying again. Hayner stumbled out of the room and across the hallway to the bathroom and to the sink. Turning the sink handle for cold water, he bent over and splashed the cool liquid onto his face, the droplets trailing down his neck as he stared at his reflection.

Red, puffy eyes, swollen and sore from the saltwater that had leaked through its ducts and disheveled and matted hair that was pressed into funny angles that flattened half of his usually wavy locks presented themselves harshly from the bathroom mirror. Taking more cold water in his cupped hands, he splashed himself and ran his fingers through his hair until it was simply wet and falling along the sides of his face and dripping down his bare chest.

_Is that really me?_

The image in the mirror looked like that of a beaten puppy. Hayner would have been ashamed, but there was no need in his life to look nice and presentable, especially if Roxas was gone. And if that didn't make things worse, the sound of the kitchen being used downstairs made him cringe into a hole. He opened the door to check to see what was going on only to be assailed by the fresh sounds and smells of breakfast.

_But mom and dad are d-_

He rushed downstairs, his wet hair flinging wildly in droplets that landed on the earth-toned walls, only to find a beanie-less blond standing with his back turned and arms moving around the stove.

_Is Seifer... cooking?_

"What the hell?"

The tall blond turned around, his eyes falling gently on Hayner for a split second before his face snapped into his signature smirk.

"What, chickenwuss? Didn't think I did nice things for people?"

Hayner began a staring contest with his table as he plopped down into the smooth wooden chair in the kitchen. He hated to admit it, but whatever it was that Seifer was making smelled... good. His stomach growled and he felt the pains of hunger stabbing into his stomach again. It had been over 48 hours since he'd had so much as water in his system. He could only remember getting up dully to go to the restroom twice in that haze of the last three days.

"No," he stated simply, crossing his arms.

"That look doesn't really work for you," Seifer commented as he set a plate of French toast between him and the owner of the house. "Now eat. You look like a cadaver."

Hayner eyed the innocent slices of bread dipped soaked in egg and milk with suspicion. Before he could turn away to grab his own breakfast from the fridge (which would probably consist of a banana and water), Seifer had picked up a slice, ripped off a corner, placed it on the other boy's lips until they parted, and poked the piece into Hayner's mouth. By instinct, the younger blond began chewing, his stomach singing praise as it was being given something for the first time in days.

And it was surprisingly... _good_. When had he learned how to cook?

"Why?" he asked after he finished the bite.

Seifer simply took a piece of bread into his mouth and chewed on it thoughtfully until he came up with the response: "because we haven't fought since summer started. Want you to be up to shape, cuz this place is so goddamn boring without you."

"Hmph."

Hayner didn't need any more prompting to feed himself and began his nearly disastrous attempt to avoid shoveling down the French toast like a garbage disposal. He could've sworn that he'd seen a satisfied (and somehow warm) smirk on Seifer's features from the corner of his eye. It didn't look... normal. But Hayner decided he didn't mind. Seifer not trying to beat him into a bloody pulp was a welcome change considering the recent happenings. His wounded pride even allowed himself to label the feeling as grateful, and receiving that kind of connotation attached to their name was a feat not many people could pull from Hayner.

Three hours later, Seifer had walked out of Hayner's front door without a word, his white trench coat wrinkled and billowing in the wind as he strode away. When Hayner finally had gotten the chance to contemplate what had happened, he found that all the laundry had been done and folded neatly in his dresser, the place had been organized, and even the bathroom had been cleaned. There was even lunch and dinner in his fridge. He could have hated Seifer for it and taken the gesture as a mocking of his weakness, but no ordinary person accomplished a feat such as this without receiving positive thoughts from the recipient's mind.

So that was exactly what Hayner did.

But when the boy found the black "Ore" beanie sitting on the top of his dresser beside the picture of him, Roxas, and Seifer when they were little, he almost cried again. It was the picture where the three once best friend had huddled around one another with Hayner on the left, his arm around Roxas's slim waist and Seifer on the right, his arm slung over both Roxas and Hayner like he was taking the two younger boys into a group hug. Hayner thought he had hidden that quite well in his bookshelf, but it seemed as though Seifer had found it once again just to mock Hayner for his weakness and trying to rile him up enough so that next time they saw each other, there could actually be a fight to satisfy Seifer's need for conflict and resolution. In effect, the older blond was cursed to hell for bringing up such the memory the day Hayner had realized the way he'd felt for Roxas and confided in Seifer about the matter...

ღஜღ

"Hey, Seif..."

"Yeah, chickadee?" the older boy responded, smiling and ruffling his younger best friend's hair.

Little ten-year-old Hayner looked down at his feet, shuffling nervously as he planned the fatal words in his head that could break their entire friendship. He really looked up to Seifer, the older boy that would beat up anyone who would pick on his younger two friends. They'd met as younger children when their mothers had befriended one another and forced the three to play together because that was what mothers did: they shoved their children together.

"I-I... I... have something to tell you..."

"Yeah?" the older boy looked down at him kindly for the last time.

The young Hayner squirmed under the weight of his own words, but it would be okay to ask Seifer to help him out, right? After all, that's what best friends do for each other.

"I-I... I l-li..."

His mouth went dry and he was unable to finish the sentence.

"You like someone?" the blond laughed, hugging the boy to his side on their shared bench seat. "Aww... Hay-Hay's growing up! C'mon, who is it?"

Little Hayner blushed and hid his face in his hands, trying his hardest not to run away. Even when he began scooting away from the park bench, Seifer managed to grab hold of his arm and drag him back.

"It's not Olette is it?" the older boy joked. "She's nice, but I don't think she's your 'type'."

"N-no, it's not Olette," he murmured. "I-It's... Erm..."

Hayner trailed off again causing Seifer to bump the younger boy playfully.

"C'mon, chickadee, spit it out!" he urged, nudging the boy with his elbow.

"I-I like Roxas!"

Hayner clamped a hand over his mouth and watched as an emotion he'd never seen before pass over Seifer's features. He wasn't sure of how to react until...

"Eww! You like boys? Hayner, boys don't like other boys. It's weird!" Seifer began yelling after his initial shock had passed. "That's so gross!"

Little Hayner watched as the boy he admired upped and left him on the bench all alone. He had been intending on getting Seifer's help to get Roxas, but a few hours later, he had gone to find Roxas alone, no moral support and the wanting to say something, **anything** about his feelings completely dissipated from his mind.

That was the last time he'd spoken kindly to Seifer. Every day from then on was a constant battle between newfound rivals and Seifer went from the endearing nickname that Hayner had surprisingly loved so much to an insulting variation that stung bitterly each time the syllables left his lips. In only two months, Seifer had found new friends Raijin and Fujin to replace Roxas and Hayner. And when the shock from the speed of Seifer's headstrong recovery had finally hit Hayner, the full impact of easy hate assaulted him. From then on, the two had stopped all talk of their days as companions and Hayner could only see the older boy as an enemy and nothing more.

ღஜღ

_Hasn't left the house since summer started so I went to see him today. He's in shitty shape. I did some cleaning around the house for him and found the old photo while I was cleaning. I didn't expect that he'd keep it. Mine's always in the hidden compartment of my wallet, but no one knows that. I dunno how he'll react to my beanie sitting next to the photo, but I'm not a guy with words and he never was either. I hope he doesn't misinterpret my actions. He's in enough pain already._

_Damn you, Roxas, you fucking lamer. No one should be allowed to hurt chickadee like that. No one._

* * *

Note: "Chickadee" is the nickname Seifer called Hayner when they were younger. Hayner used to absolutely worship Seifer's confidence and 'maturity'. Think of it as a stepping stone to the evolution of the "chickenwuss".

For every review recieved, Seifer has dirty thoughts about his chickadee!

_Bisous, Miniki_


	3. Seeing Double

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
So I'm officially having way too much fun doing this instead of studying for my test in AP HumGeo. Gah. I'm gonna epic fail that class... Anyways, enjoy this update at the costly death of my school grades. :O

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Seeing Double

_"Hello? It's Olette - I'm sure you haven't isolated yourself long enough to forget my voice, but still... I know you're there. Please, just pick up... Hayner? Hayner? ... All right then. Pence and I miss you and I know I haven't called you as much as he has, but you haven't been out of the house for almost a week now. Seriously, two more days and I'm busting in there! ... Hayner, please. I miss you, too. It was bad enough that Roxas and Axel left, but I can't have you leaving too... Please, come back."_

Hayner lay on the couch clutching a pillow to his chest while he stared at the ceiling until the detail blurred like a failed work of art a painter smudged repeatedly with his fist. Mechanic beeps rang through the empty house and he shoved the pillow against his body until it could've sworn the molecules would mingle with his skin.

Although Seifer had stopped by his house two days ago, he hadn't so much as opened a window. He began eating again, but only the food that the other blond had prepared for him and left in the fridge. The waves of hurt he'd been feeling when his best friend left had dulled into a numbed hole in his chest. It felt like anything and everything was passing though him and if someone were to wave fans blowing massive amounts of air in his direction, every current would redirect itself to the hollow in his chest and pass through with the vicious tearing of sorrow itself.

Hayner turned against his couch, his back popping at the sound. His muscles and joints felt stiff and unused like his entire body's frame was going to give out sometime soon. He hated it.

But Olette was right. She missed him and for the others, it was like losing both Roxas and Hayner. Although the other half of the unbroken friend group had obviously been ready to get together (and actually probably were behind his back), that didn't mean they would love their friends less. Hayner knew that in his mind, but somehow the prospect of being the only one of the trio that was alone made him...

_Lonely._

Rolling off the couch, Hayner tossed the pillow back onto the couch and sat up straight on the floor. Suddenly, the feeling of the dry roof of his mouth and his chapped lips was irritating and the texture of his wrinkled clothes disgusted him. Without particularly giving a damn, he pulled his shirt up over his head and tossed it onto the couch after his pillow. As he was getting up from his spot on the floor, a series of rapid knocks sounded at the door.

_Fuck._

He stumbled over to the front entrance and caught his failing balance on one of the wooden chairs. Straightening himself up (and still not particularly giving a damn about his appearance), Hayner unlatched the door and yanked it open.

"Hey, Hayner." Olette stood there, her hands wringing nervously in front of her lap. "I-I came to check on you..."

Without thinking, the blond swept the other girl up into his arms.

"I'm sorry, 'Lette," he murmured.

An inhale of oxygen through the nose, sharp and subtle sounded beside Hayner's ear. The brunet in his arms pulled back and smiled up at him, blinking away her tears as Hayner wiped them away with his index finger.

"It's alright."

ღஜღ

A slight summer breeze across his skin, the feeling of the heat of bright rays falling unevenly upon his face... In all honesty, it was good to get out again. Even though the sensation of walking without having a bundle of curved blond spikes bouncing at his side was awkward, he still had Pence and Olette. Occasionally, he would see either or both of his friends send worried looks in his direction.

"Aww... Look who's out again. It's the little chickenwuss!"

From across the Sandlot, Seifer approached the trio with his usual cocky saunter. As if on instinctive defense, his remaining two friend stepped in front of him to block the three bullies heading their direction.

"Heard you lost your little boy toy to the pyro. That why you haven't been out, lamer?"

_What?_

The confusion in his eyes must have been extremely noticeable because Fuu failed to show any visible notice of the change in his facial features while Rai actually furrowed his eyebrows in scrutinizing interest the moment he'd felt the change in his face. If Fuu was pretending not to notice, it must be glaringly obvious to everyone else. That much, Hayner knew for sure. Just because he didn't hang out with them didn't mean he couldn't notice them. He and Seifer were fighting against each other frequently enough for him to pick up at least the basics of his rival's best friends.

Seifer strode up to the trio and crossed his arms, wearing his trademark smirk as he did so. Hayner should have said something (or perhaps he shouldn't have? Who knew), but his eyes wouldn't leave the older boy's face. His light, silky blond hair that was no longer being oppressed by his Ore beanie brushed against his cheeks in the slight breeze of him walking forward, and Hayner couldn't help but stare as the older blond drew nearer to their group. Sans beanie, Seifer actually looked rather attractive.

_Woah, what the hell?_

"Sh-shut up!" Olette glared in his direction, her tiny fists clenched against the hem of her shorts.

"Oh, that's rich," Seifer scoffed. "You need a puny little girl to protect you now, lamer? You need _her_ to fight your battles for you?"

Pence narrowed his eyes and took Olette's hand quietly as they closed the remaining gap between the two blonds. Surprisingly, instead of breaking past the two to demand a fight from Hayner, Seifer shot one smug lowering of the eyebrows at the three and turned away. As Pence and Olette turned away, Hayner took a last glance back at the older boy only to lock eyes with the other for a short instance before he left the Sandlot.

"He makes me so... _angry_."

Directly in front of him, Pence slung an arm around Olette's should and hugged her closer to the side of his body. The physical contact seemed to calm her down drastically as her shoulder slumped and she leaned back into his touch. Although Hayner was happy for them, part of his heart started back on that dull aching feeling from before.

"Hey, don't worry about it. He left us alone, didn't he?"

"Yeah," the petit girl sighed, smiling. "I guess he did."

ღஜღ

He lay in his bed, fingering the cloth of the Ore beanie between his fingers absentmindedly. The cloth felt thick but comfortable as he pulled it up from his chest and closer to his face and inhaled the scent.

_Why am I even doing this?_

Maybe it was because the day had felt so unreal. Everywhere he went all the trio would get were either sympathetic smiles or condescending smirks from passersby. Pence and Olette treated him like he was going to shatter at the touch of a butterfly's wing beat, constantly opening doors for him and offering to fetch whatever it was that he wanted at the moment, which, in all honesty, was Roxas, and there was no way he would be able to get the younger blond back.

Almost everyone had avoided him or begun acting awkward around him once he'd finally shown up after his week of absence. He tried talking to some of his Struggle friends only finding that half of them ignored him (and snickered 'gay fag' under their breath) while the other half would do to him like Pence and Olette had - try to cradle him 'til he fucking snapped. He didn't want pity. He didn't ask for sympathy. He didn't need their animosity.

Hayner craved _substance_.

And that was why he held that beanie to his face and inhaled once more, the scent that was so distinctly male it made him shiver happily. This was substance; substance of the only person who had treated him normally in public today...

"Seifer?"

The boy's name came out as a whisper through his lips and into the black cotton of the accessory Hayner had clutched close against his senses. Outside his window, the sound of a playful smirk followed by a chuckle drift into his room. He could identify that smile from miles away.

_Why is he even here? Actually, why was he here last time? What the hell!_

This time, curiosity got the best of him and Hayner slipped out of bed and over to the window, quickly dropping the beanie on the side of his dresser closer to the couch and slid the glass away to let the other boy in. Hayner didn't know why he had opened his house to his rival, but almost as if by instinct, he simply did.

Without saying a word, he crawled back into bed, nestling his face into the pillow as he watched Seifer move from the windowsill to the couch against the opposite wall of his bed. He followed Seifer with his eyes and watched as the other boy picked up his beanie, a crooked smile lighting his lips as he leaned over to pluck the cotton off Hayner's dresser. Some part of him knew that Seifer had realized Hayner had moved it. Something about the way the older boy handled the article of clothing made Hayner squirm. Maybe the beanie was warm or started smelling like Hayner?

_Whatever._

Moonlight came through the now open blinds of the window and spilled down contentedly and illuminated the creamy carpet along with half of Seifer's corn silk locks. Hayner could feel the hollow feeling in his chest dissipate as he watched the gleam of his rival's hair shimmer whenever the older bully moved. Looking up from his fiddling with the beanie, the larger blond's eyes met Hayner's in a gentle and surprised manner. Seifer smiled kindly and simply laid back in Hayner's couch, the two of them holding quiet eye contact in the unseeing dark until Hayner fell asleep.

ღஜღ

_He looked better today, like he'd been eating and finally breathing. Honestly, it was nice to see that he was doing a bit better... I think. I checked his fridge after he fell asleep and the food I made for him's gone. He's not an idiot, so I know he didn't just throw it away. Plus, chickadee lives alone and I know for a fact that no one other than me and Olette (hey, I've got my sources) has been over to his house in the past few days, so he didn't feed it to anyone other than him. Food doesn't mysteriously poof like that._

_Augh. I'm getting too happy about the prospect of him eating my food. This is stupid..._

_Whatever. Chickadee looks nice when he's out. Kinda reminds me of the sleepovers we used to have between the whole thing that happened to his parents and before he met Roxas. I'm just glad child services hasn't caught on yet. Leon would probably get in trouble if they knew what was going on._

_Gods... why? Why did Roxas have to happen?_

* * *

For every review recieved, Hayner takes a peek at Seifer and has another curious (read: dirty) thought about the other boy's bodaaaay.

So yeah. I pretty much think that Seiner is a way underappreciated subfandom and that they have the most chemistry I've ever read about between two people. Honestly, I love them together and I'd have it no other way. :)

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	4. Two Faced

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
Two updates in two days? What kind of crack am I on! Especially now that I've got about four KH fanfics going on at once... I think I'm a linguistic masochist but I'll try to lessen the pain by putting this fic first in all of my priorities.

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Two-Faced

In all honesty, Hayner liked that the next morning wasn't all that different from the previous week's visit. Seifer had been downstairs cooking wordlessly, the same way he had carried on only a few mornings before. Breakfast was quiet, but not as awkward as last time. By the time the older blond left, there was another few days' worth of food in Hayner's fridge, ready to heat and serve.

_Probably found out that I ate what he left last time. Maybe he's afraid that I'd forget to eat or something... Whatever. I just don't get that guy._

"Hayner, is everything okay? You look like you're thinking pretty hard..."

The boy was snapped back into reality as Olette called his name, a worried look coming over her face. Before the blond could ease Olette's growing concern, the trio rounded the corner and found themselves once again at the Sandlot.

"Look who's here," a cocky, kiss-my-ass voice called out, "it's the chickenwuss and his lamer sidekicks."

"Shut up, Seifer. Nobody asked you!"

"Oh yeah?" The older boy crossed his arms and shifted his weight to his right leg, his hip jutting out and his shirt riding up slightly. "Well I just think it's too bad and too sad that the little fucker can't seem to stand up for himself. Now that his little crush is gone, I bet he gets lonely at night. 'Specially since you're such a great friend and skipping out on him half the time to go hang out with chunky over there."

For behind Hayner, Pence let out an indignant "hey!" as he stepped forward and took Olette's hand.

Hayner watched near emotionless as the older blond bully smirked and blew off every suppressed angry protest Olette threw at him. Discomfort growing into anger, the boy began making his way silently toward the fighting pair. Normally, it should have been Hayner arguing with the older boy while Roxas and Pence held him back, but he just didn't have the willingness to fight with anyone lately.

_Roxas__..._

Suddenly, Seifer took a menacingly close step toward the younger girl, his fight face flickering back and forth from his features. Pence tried to get in the bully's way but was only pushed to the ground and restrained by Rai as he tried to lunge forward to help Olette. Fire flared in her eyes as she looked up into Seifer's face, unflinching. Hayner could see his fists clenching inside his trench coat pockets as the cloth wrinkled and settled by his thighs. As if it was on innate reflex, Hayner jumped forth and punched Seifer straight in the jaw.

"... the fuck was that for?" the bigger blond stumbled back, holding his face in his palms.

"Don't touch her."

"You think I'd hit a fucking girl? What the hell are you on!"

Before anyone would stop them, the two blonds were already wrestling one another in the dirt, their fists colliding with almost every stretch of flesh they could find. A particularly raw groan tore from his throat as he felt his wrist pop loudly from the impact of one of Seifer's smashes. His vision flashed from Seifer's face down to his wrist and back up again. A slight twitch of shock pierced through Seifer's eyes and the older boy quickly rearranged his grip from Hayner's wrist to his forearm.

The older blond leaned in close pressing his lips to the space behind Hayner's ear and whispering against the skin of Hayner's neck so quietly he almost thought the boy on top of him hadn't even spoken.

"Forget Roxas."

Hayner's eyes widened and he tried to turn his head to the right to meet Seifer's gaze, but failed when Seifer got off him and dusted his clothes off, the white of his trench coat now a sandy tan and his Ore beanie spotted with flecks of dust.

"Fucking chickenwuss can't fight for shit," he spat, not making eye contact as he did so. "Come back when you grow a pair."

_What?_

"Hayner's got more balls than you'd ever have!" Pence yelled as Rai let go of him.

"Yeah!" Olette agreed, "_you_ are the one that needs to grow a pair!"

With the last angry remarks, his two friends helped him up from where he lay on the ground nursing his new wound. He felt a bit of something trickle down his cheek and as the motion of his body swung forward flecks of red splashed onto the dirt before him. His reached a hand up to touch his cheek and felt an instant sharp pain the moment his fingertips met the deep cut.

"Fuck..." he whispered. Olette heard him and glared at Seifer and his gang.

"Let's get you out of here," she muttered icily and the trio left without another look back.

ღஜღ

The warm steam from the shower filled the bathroom, fogging up the mirrors and surround Hayner with its gentle warmth. With his good arm, Hayner reached into the shower and turned off the stream of water letting all of what he'd gathered in the tub settle into a shallow, liquid stillness.

Water seeped up through the corner of the washcloth that Hayner dipped into the warm bath water. He let it sit there until the liquid had seeped up through the cloth until it almost met his fingertips. Using both arms would have been easier but he wasn't sure about the status of his wrist and decided to use the tub's rim for help folding the cloth. Carefully, he laid the washcloth flat against the side of the tub and folded it twice into a smaller square.

Dab once, dab twice; Hayner carefully cleaned around his wound as he sat only in his boxers on the small plastic stool he'd set beside his tub. Without care, one of the dabs of water trickled into his open wound and he winced as the stinging feeling seeped throughout the length of the gash.

Pain dabbled across more sections of his body as he cleaned out the last of his limbs and torso before Hayner unplugged the stopper in the bottom of his tub and watched the water drain away.

With another sigh, he left the bathroom with the first aid kit tucked under his arm. In his room, the clock read that it was some time part midnight. He would always come around this time to lend a helping hand; he was always here to patch Hayner up. Those gentle, trembling hands always brushed the iodine with the utmost care against his skin and the other boy's bright blue eyes would go soft and apologetic whenever he'd accidentally made Hayner whimper.

_Roxas__..._

Tapping, steady, hollow, and rhythmic sounded against the glass of his bedroom window. Not knowing exactly why he did it, Hayner threw open the sliding glass and stepped back to watch this time as his rival slipped surprisingly elegantly through the opening. For some reason, Seifer wasn't wearing his usual trench coat and the shirt he'd normally had on underneath it was unzipped fully and exposing his well-built chest.

_He's got really nice abs. I wonder... Augh, what the hell? I'm staring._

Shaking the thoughts out of his head, the shorter male sat gently back down onto the bed, popping open the white top of the box and taking out the small bottle of iodine and a pinch full of cue tips. As usual, Seifer took his seat on the couch and leaned back to watch the younger male disinfect his wounds.

Hayner squeezed his eyes shut as he dabbed the last of the wounds on his upper torso with the last cue tip. He forced his eyes open in the dimly lit room (thanks to his color-changing night light that he'd bought because the colors were actually soothing to watch at night) only to see Seifer staring straight at him. Shaking off the unease, he pulled out a roll of bandages and stretched it across his torso.

Fumbling hands and all thumbs. Roxas had always laughed at how he couldn't put bandages on a plank of wood to save his life. He cursed under his breath as the bandages slipped from his fingers and fell into a ring around his body, useless on the mattress. He was about to attempt bandaging himself up again when out in the edges of his vision, he saw Seifer's bare feet (for the older boy had kicked off his shoes and placed them under the windowsill).

"You suck at this. Move."

Hayner crossed his arms quite painfully and glared up at the older male. Instead of reacting with anger, Seifer simply nudged the boy off the bed and sat down. He slipped out of his vest and threw the article of clothing toward where he'd stored his shoes and scooted farther away from Hayner until his back touched the wall.

"Sit," he commanded.

Hayner stared in shock as the older boy motioned to his lap. When the slighter blond didn't move, Seifer pulled the teen down to the space he'd created between his legs.

"Fuck, lamer," he mumbled, "just let go of your silly pride and let me help you."

He pulled the other boy closer against him so that his bare chest was almost pressed flush against Hayner's back. He reached around the younger blond as if he was going to embrace Hayner like a lover. A chuckle sounded from beside Hayner's head when his breath hitched, causing him to blush and look away from the arms almost wrapped around his torso.

"Hold still, aight, chickenwuss?"

Biting his tongue, Hayner shut up and only grunted as Seifer pulled the bandages around torso. He whimpered as Seifer pulled the bandage a bit too tightly around a cut the other boy had made with the zipper on his vest.

"Sorry..." he heard in a whisper. He almost turned around to look at Seifer's face for confirmation but stopped as the older male pressed himself almost against Hayner's body.

_Am I imagining it or is Seifer getting closer? And is it just me or is the room getting hotter? My face is flushing, isn't it? What the fuck is he do-_

He entire body stiffened and tingled as he felt the other boy's chin rest on his shoulder. Hot breath pooled out against the sensitive spot on his neck as Hayner involuntarily shuddered, the slight movement sending his neck to the side just barely enough to brush Seifer's still lips. He let out a light groan as he moved again and felt those lips still attached to his skin.

"Wh-"

"Shh..." Seifer pressed himself closer against the younger boy, his calloused fingertip silencing Hayner's lips.

Body on autopilot, Hayner leaned back into Seifer's chest and exhaled deeply. The blond bully was much better at wrapping him up than Roxas ever was. He could physically feel the difference when he shifted his body's center of gravity so that it lay closer to the older male behind him. He could feel Seifer's smooth, hairless chest against his body and instantly warmed a few shades as the older boy reached forward between Hayner's side and his left arm to grab another roll of bandages. The feeling of Seifer's strong arms on the sensitive sides of his skin was almost too much to bear as he felt his body flushing to the last shade it would reach before blood flow began directing itself both North and South of the border.

"Cut on your face..." he whispered.

Hayner nodded and tried to turn himself to face the older boy but winced when his body twisted painfully to the right. Silent, Seifer adjusted their bodies until Hayner was facing Seifer, his legs spread around the other boy's torso in what would have been a compromising position had someone else walked into the room. Hayner was sure that his rival was aware of how they looked, and even though the bigger blond had a distant look in his eyes, the slight blush that powered against the usually angry boy's calm face spoke otherwise.

Seifer leaned forward and the younger teen in his lap scooted back only to find that a strong had was supporting his backside as the owner of the hand reached forward for the bottle of iodine and another cue tip.

After wetting the cotton tip in the bottled, Seifer gently capped the container and screwed the lid on quickly, tossing it back to its place beside the first aid kit. The hand on Hayner's back trailed up softly - almost intimately - and stopped to rest on the back of his neck, pulling him forward and supporting his head as Seifer leaned in close to apply the iodine onto the cut on Hayner's cheek.

_Not even Roxas used to take care of me like this..._

It must have been an unconscious action because partway through the disinfecting, Seifer's strong fingers began massaging gently into Hayner's skull in a dull, sensuous, circular motion that always drove him wild. Gently pleasurable shivers spread from the spot of contact and his eyes slid shut at the steady, relaxing pressure of the other male's fingers on his skin. Without his sight, Hayner could feel the Seifer's breath on his lips as they were close enough to kiss and never break apart. Unable to stop himself, Hayner leaned his head back and effectively exposed his smooth, tanned neck to the other male. He felt the other boy lean closer and breathe in Hayner's scent. He could feel the other boy's chest pressed flush against his and unable to suppress the heat any longer, Hayner let out a single, quiet, subtle, _satisfying _moan.

That was when Seifer lost control.

Gossamer kisses brushed against his throat and trailed behind his ear while heated exhales colored his skin lust. He felt Seifer latch his lips to the hollow behind his jaw and below his ear, nipping and sucking at the soft flesh until he drew another sound from Hayner's perfectly parted lips.

_What... am I..._

"Seifer... why..." he breathed as he could've sworn the older boy had flicked a tongue out to taste his skin.

Receiving no answer and hardly able to think straight, Hayner wrapped his arms around the other male and pushed his body closer. Hayner felt his rival move their bodies into a laying position down on the mattress. The older blond detached his lips from Hayner's neck and the thinner male whimpered in protest and the sudden loss of stimulation.

The pain in his sides was practically nonexistent now. All Hayner could think of was Seifer and feel the pure want burning in his body. But wasn't he supposed to want Roxas? If anything, Seifer was the opposite of sweet, unrequitable Roxas... But Roxas would never handle him like this. No, the younger boy would only allow Hayner to touch him and would only do so once every other blue moon a year before he'd gotten together with Axel.

But then why was be enjoying this so much?

Seifer said nothing as he readjusted their position so that Hayner lay snuggled into the crook of the other boy's arm, falling asleep there as soon as he snuggled in close enough; and it not because he consciously wanted to, but because it felt... _right_.

ღஜღ

_Shit, I really fucked up. I mean, there's no way in hell that anything could be more fucking perfect right now, but... God dammit, this is way too fucking early for this! What the hell was I thinking climbing into his__stupidass__ window like that? Why can't I just fucking stop coming here? It's not liked I owe him a damn thing, seeing as how we treat each other like shit now... kinda._

_Dammit, tomorrow morning is going to be so fucking awkward. God dammit, I can't _**_think_**_ right now! This is chickadee we're talking about! How the hell am I supposed to fucking look him in the eyes and tell him that I lo-_**_like_**_ him? (Shit, I did I really just say that?)_

_Fuck. I kissed chickadee and... and... shit, I think he liked it, the bastard._

* * *

For every review recieved, Seifer kisses and bites Hayner again on the neck!  
So, like, I WAY expand time whenever sensual things happen because it's just my style. That's right. You better be squealing. XD

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	5. Don't Speak

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
Mature Content Warning for the end of this chapter.

It's only been about 9 two weeks since I started this story, but I'm learning a lot from it. I've figured out how stories should be paced. I'm tired of writing fluff chapters and it's time to move everything forward - in every one of my projects! I can slip in some effective characterization while I'm at it, right? Tell me what you think about my overall pacing? I'm looking forward to some constructive feedback! :D

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Don't Speak

"I just don't get it. What do you mean by 'Seifer's been acting weird lately'? I don't see any difference; he's the same jerk that he's always been!"

Olette swung her legs like a pendulum as she took another lick of her sea salt ice-cream bar. Beside her, Pence was just finishing up his first one while simultaneously reaching for a second. Olette rolled her eyes and slapped vainly at his outstretched hand.

_No, he wasn't always like this..._

"Yeah, I don't see any of what you say he's been doing," Pence agreed as he pushed apart the plastic wrapping and took the first lick at his new sea salt ice-cream bar.

He pulled his knees to his chest and mumbled a faint, "never mind". Ever since the previous night's events, all he could think of was Seifer and his touches, his kisses, his voice, his... everything. _Everything_.

A flush rose to Hayner's cheeks as he recalled the way he'd woken up to the older boy tracing patterns across the skin of his chest; the feeling of the tingling, sensual touches over his bruised flesh and the fingers that trailed languidly down the side of his neck as his eyes fluttered open that morning haunted his memory. Even though the blond bully hadn't fully kissed him on the lips, Hayner couldn't help but blush and wonder at what would have happened if he did. How much did the other boy know? What would Seifer have tasted like? How far would they go next time?

_'Next time!' What the hell am I on?_ he snapped at himself. _There must be something in the ice cream..._

"Hayner?" Olette called, coaxing him out of his thoughts, "you don't look too good. Do you want to go home?"

The boy hesitated. If he went home, then it would just be another trip back into the week of isolation he'd endured only few days before. Still, being with his friends constantly trailed his thoughts back to Roxas, so he decided on the lesser of two evils and nodded.

"All right then. We'll take you home."

When Hayner stepped into his house, he knew something was off. The inside of the house usually smelled lightly floral and a little boyish, but never... spicy. Although Pence and Olette didn't seem to notice anything, Hayner was sure something was wrong. He ordered the two to say in the living room and kitchen area as he rushed up the stairs. Instead of making the second right turn in the hallway to his bathroom, Hayner went to the door across from his and threw it open only to find a very seductive and very _shirtless _Seifer laying on his bed.

"Hey there, chickenwuss."

And then he _winked_.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Hayner hissed, closing the door as fast and as silently as he could.

Seifer stayed silent as he sauntered over to where Hayner leaned against the wall. With an amount of confidence that no living male has ever or should have, the larger teen quickly pressed himself against Hayner. With his right forearm leaning on the door, Seifer lowered his face so that his eye level was even with Hayner's.

"We need to talk."

"That's just what I was thinking," he hissed back icily, scowling. The older boy just smirked.

Hayner blushed as he pressed his palms firmly against the other male's toned chest to push him off, the feeling of the other male's tight muscles smooth under his fingertips was simply too much. When had he begun noticing all of these things about the other boy? Three weeks ago he probably would have punched any person who even jokingly dared him to kiss his rival, but now...

_Now I'd probably do it because I fucking **like** it._

Not wanting to face that current train of thought, he quickly derailed it and ducked out of his room. He began to take the steps, cursing himself for wanting to get down there as fast as possible while he was unable to calm his red face. As he was about to reach the first step that could be seen form the living room, he turned and went back up the stairs, rushing into the bathroom and flushing the toilet as to keep his story straight. While he washed his hands, he splashed some of the water on his face.

_It's just a hallucination. The fucker isn't in my room. Nope, no way in hell is he in my room shirtless and gorgeous and fucka- Hayner, stop it! You're **not** getting fucking **aroused** over this._

This time, he was able to get down the stairs without a facial issue. His pants, on the other hand, were getting a bit too stifling for his tastes. He forced himself to think of other things, like Axel and Roxas 'together' or maybe an old, naked nun or his arch neme-

**_Shit._**

"Hayner, I just heard you swear. Are you okay?"

_Damn, they worry about me way too fucking much._

"Yeah," he reassured the girl as he reached the last step and turned to his left to face her. "You and Pence can leave now. I'll probably just rest in bed for today and see you guys later. Don't sweat it, all right?"

"We could make you some soup if you want," Pence offered as he cracked open Hayner fridge. As he turned back around, his heart almost stopped.

Inside the white kitchen appliance was a plethora of food from different locales looking expertly delicious. It seemed as if there were no ingredients left and only fully prepared dishes labeled mysteriously with 'eat by' dates in a handwriting neither of Hayner's two best friends recognized. Hayner could see Pence's eyes light up as his gaze fell upon a delicious-looking pastry from his favorite store.

"Woah," the three of them breathed in unison. Hayner quickly covered up his surprise by adding; "I didn't think there was that much food in there last night. I guess the darkness and sleep deprivation does do something to you..."

Olette's eyebrows furrowed, obviously skeptical. She crossed her arms and jutted her hip out to the right, attitude flaring slightly as he eyes locked onto Hayner's.

"What is this?"

And to his immense horror, Hayner hesitated. Oh, fuck he was screwed.

"I need to eat, don't I? So what if I tried out a few recipes while I was locked up?"

After a brief moment of silence, Olette stepped forward and took Hayner into a tight hug.

"All right then. We'll leave for now, but call us if you start to feel better or worse. We'll be over in a flash, okay?"

"Okay...?"

"I'll see ya later, man."

" 'Kay, Pence. Later guys?" Hayner managed out long after they had gone. Apparently something was going on because his last remaining male friend simply agreed with the brunette and the two left his house without another word.

From up the stairs, Hayner could hear the blond bully rustling around in his room. The sudden sound made his ears perk up and prompted him to rush up the stairs almost tripping into an excited face plant on the last step. From Hayner's open bedroom door, he could see Seifer chuckling at his near-fatal facial almost injury.

"So what do the fucking hell you want to talk about?" Hayner asked, almost accusingly as he crossed his arms and glared at the older blond.

He didn't get his answer as Seifer practically leapt off the bed and snatched Hayner by the arm to drag him into his own bedroom. With only a light, almost playful growl, the older boy pushed him onto the mattress and began attacking his neck with kisses and bites. Hayner couldn't help but let out a half-moan, half-yelp as the older boy bit down on the place where his shoulder met neck and began sucking _hard_. Pushing aside the growing euphoria the hands under his shirt were evoking, Hayner shifted his weight up so that Seifer's face was even to his clothed chest instead of his face.

"I thought you said you wanted to talk."

He tried to say it in an angry tone, but the distraction of hands under sliding up his shirt was sapping the anger from his words and coating his thoughts in a heavy blanket of fuzzy warmth.

"Changed my mind," the other boy whispered into his ear.

He looked up to see a prominent smirk on the other boy's face. Seifer's deep blue eyes were boring into his as if demanding permission to continue further. Hayner granted it with his lips pressed against the other boy's neck.

Pulling the other boy atop him, the smaller blond wrapped his arms around the other boy's neck, effectively pressing their bodies together quite intimately. To Hayner's immense surprise, the other male suddenly pressed his thigh roughly against Hayner's groin, pulling a strained moan from his throat with the utmost elegance the two boys together could muster. In response, Hayner pressed his hips against Seifer's stifling body and could feel the smirk against his skin when the older blond pulled away. Unconsciously, the younger teen pouted as he locked eyes with his rival. The smirk only grew when Seifer repositioned his body so that his face was angled toward the lower half of Hayner's body.

"What are you-"

He threw his head back into the pillow and let out a wanton moan as the other boy began massaging him through the thick, but surprisingly stretchy fabric of his jeans. Seifer pushed up his shirt and began brushing his fingertips seductively over the semi-toned skin and unbuttoned his pants with his teeth. He pushed down the remaining cloth to the middle of Hayner's thighs and breathed all over Hayner's arousal, lips hovering mere millimeters over the heated flesh in a cocky smirk. Without thinking, Hayner moved his hands so that they were fisted in Seifer's hair and pushed the other boy's face closer.

Seifer complied and engulfed most of Hayner's arousal through his lips and covered the rest with his calloused hands. Hayner made more unidentifiable noises as the feeling of the heated suction and pain from the slight scraping of teeth that drenched his senses and shoved him roughly into overdrive.

This was so different from Roxas. In fact, it was always Hayner touching Roxas, never the other way around. He was always there to pleasure the other boy and was never satisfied with himself in the end. Even though he could tell in the back of his mind that this experience was new to Seifer, he didn't care. After all, he'd never been treated this way before and, damn, did it feel _good_.

With his other arm, Seifer pinned down Hayner's hips to the mattress as the boy's movements became more frenzied and he almost gagged the other male. With a low growl, Seifer roughly pressed his tongue against the lowest part of Hayner's shaft that he could reach and ran his tongue up until he reached the slit. With a flick, he teased the other boy until the jerking motion was insuppressible and he simply applied as much suction as possible to the end of Hayner's length, his other hand running constantly up and down the rest of the unmouthed skin.

"Ah... Ah-!"

Air rushed out of his lungs as his eyes fluttered open, unseeing. He could feel the wetness between his legs and knew that it had undoubtedly gotten on his pants. Uncaring, he felt Seifer begin to lick up the white liquid until all that was left were the stains on Hayner's pants. He slid off the other boy's jeans and replaced his boxers where they were before exiting the room.

"Where?" Hayner asked, unable to form a complete sentence.

"Cleaning mouth," the older male replied. "Just because I licked it up doesn't mean that it tastes good."

Eventually, Seifer returned to his room and sat down on the bed beside him. The beanie less blond planted a kiss on Hayner's forehead and lay down beside him on the mattress.

"Why?" he asked, curling away from the other male, embarrassed. "Why the hell did you do that?"

"Because I wanted to."

He couldn't help but smile at the answer, especially when he felt strong arms remove his shirt and toss it away onto his floor. A tanned forearm slipped across his stomach and rough fingers began tracing circles in the skin around his navel. It was a pleasant feeling to have another body pressed up against his from behind, warm and embracing.

"You 'wanted to'?" he accused. "What do you mean by that?"

"Nothing in particular."

It would take an idiot to miss that the bully was lying. Instead of allowing his mind the joys of following the conversation flow, Hayner veered off that track and jumped to an entirely new one filled with questions and flashbacks to a happier time - before he'd even met Roxas. The thoughts in his head swirled until they converged into a single mass of words that sorted themselves out to the point where they had some element of linguistic coherence.

"What do you see in me?"

Seifer didn't answer for a month.

* * *

For every review recieved, Seifer pins Hayner to the mattress again for another round.  
Also, for those of you who are like "WTF, where's Seifer's thoughts?", I didn't feel like having them would be appropriate in this chapter. :)

_Bisous, Minikimii_  
P.S. Yay! The site's back up! I was going thorugh withdrawl, too. :O


	6. Come Out

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
I read reading one of the worst chaptered fics I've ever laid my eyes on today. I felt physically disgusting after reading it. No offense to the authoress, but... dear LORD, how can someone fuck up a plot _that_ badly, especially when they're so talented in the actual manupulation of words? "Oh, let's just stick in a murder-filled past for Riku when there was no indication of it in the beginning or the plot summary!" -sigh- I don't know what I would've done if it was a Seiner.

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Come Out

_What are we?_

The words fell frequently and unstoppably like rain in Hayner's mind as the blond sat on the bleachers holding his face in his hands. He'd been waiting at the Sandlot since ten in the morning, idly watching the sun bake the few random leaves brushing along the dusty ground. Pence and Olette had bumped into him about twenty minutes into his sitting there, the two of them blushing madly as they tried to explain why they were together without Hayner. He simply smiled and told them it was all right for them to hang out without him – he'd only feel like a third wheel anyway.

Hayner, on the other hand, had spent the last few days thinking long and hard about what had happened last time Seifer had visited his home. Ever since that day, he hadn't so much as seen or even heard about the bully. That, quite frankly, pissed him off.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Hayner looked up from the ground and stared straight into his rival's eyes.

"I'd like to know what the fuck _you_ were doing to _me_ a few days ago," he accused back icily.

Seifer only smirked. Beside him, Rai and Fuu clenched their fists and advanced on the shorter blond. However, before the pair could advance on Hayner, Seifer held a hand up to halt them.

"Leave," he commanded.

The two backed off. Rai brought a hand up to his arm and rolled his shoulder back once as he popped his neck. Meanwhile, the silverette, Fuu, simply huffed and crossed her arms over her torso.

"Why?" Fuu questioned, glaring coldly into Hayner's eyes. He held her gaze until Seifer responded.

"Didn't I already tell you?" Seifer hissed. "You can leave now; I've got the chickenwuss under control."

" 'Tell you' what, Seifer?" Hayner demanded.

Upon receiving no answer, the shorter boy narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms, ignored. Fuu glared again. An exasperated sigh left Hayner's lips as he watched the transaction before him.

"C'mon, Fuu," Rai laid a hand on her shoulder, gently leading her away from the blond pair, "Seif means it, ya know?"

With an indignant 'humph', the silverette turned her back on them and left the sandlot.

"Inform," she called behind her.

Seifer's face dropped and his eyes narrowed into a hard glare.

" 'Tell you' _what_, Seifer?" Hayner repeated while he grabbed the other boy's collar and pulled Seifer closer so that he was snarling a demand into the taller blond's face as soon as the two had turned the corner for a good amount of time.

"Do you _want_ to fight," Seifer huffed, voice thick with some sort of passionate emotion. Instead of answering the other boy's question, the bully had put something resembling his fight face on.

"Maybe I do!" he shot back.

Before Hayner reacted, Seifer had already started punching him in the gut. On instinct, he whipped up an arm to block himself while launching another attack of his own aimed at the other male's face, only to have his hand caught and stopped by a vice grip on his fist. As fast as he could, he grabbed the other teen's arm and pushed him backward roughly until they both landed on the ground. In the middle of the dirt, Hayner straddled his waist and struggled to pin the other boy to the ground.

"But you need to stop sending mixed signals and tell me what _you_ want," Hayner hissed.

Seifer growled and flipped their positions, the dust flying up lightly into their hair, clothes, and eyes.

"You know what I want."

Hayner's breath hitched as the older male readjusted his body and grinded roughly against the lithe boy's groin, a plucky smirk lighting his previously hard features. Through the cloth of his pants, Hayner could feel Seifer's arousal pressing into his own. Blood rushed to his face and groin and Seifer grinned in triumph.

"I didn't think you meant-"

Hayner was unable to protest as his breath was cut off by the sudden, startling way his wrists were pinned above his head. The blond atop him leaned forward so that their faces were mere breadths apart, both their faces flushing from the heat of the battle and the heat of arousal. Seifer chuckled, little puffs of air brushing against Hayner's lips. Only when he'd become light-headed did Hayner realize that he couldn't breathe. Seifer noticed as well and too the chance to turn his gaze lower, brushing his nose against the sweating skin of Hayner's jaw line and pressing his lips to the fading mark that was once a deep purple hickey. Without restraints, the boy quickly took to spreading heated kisses all over Hayner's throat, lapping up the sweat and some of the dust that covered the hot skin.

Seifer bit down particularly hard on a spot on Hayner's neck and began sucking on the flesh to recreate his markings on the slighter boy.

"Nngh…"

"You should make that sound more often," the older male murmured against his neck soon after he unlatched his teeth and lips from Hayner's neck.

Seifer dipped lower to slide his tongue along the curves and crevices of Hayner's collarbone. He was vaguely aware of the restrains on his hands loosening and the other male's rough hands slid upward from holding him down by the forearm. The tough skin of Seifer's fingers and palms against the softness of his inner arms and wrists scratched in a pleasant way, dragging a trail up to where their fingers laced and stayed.

With the strength of Seifer's grip fading on his hands, he pushed out of the other boy's grasp and pulled off his Ore beanie. Seifer chuckled against his skin as Hayner ran his fingers continuously through blond strands of sweat damp hair. Slowly, Seifer's hips began grinding against his, pulling another series of embarrassing sounds from deep inside his throat. Solace was only found in the fact that Seifer had begun to make similar groans and moans as well.

As Hayner's hands fisted in Seifer's hair, Seifer's finger began brushing their way up under Hayner's T-shirt. Again, the roughness of the bully's hands was against the muscled yet smooth strips of skin of his torso, the scratching feeling only adding to the situation as Hayner began grinding up against Seifer's hips in response.

Amidst the haze of rushing blood and fervent touches, Hayner's gaze lolled to the left toward the entrance of the sandlot.

_FUCK!_

He could see the shock and confusion on Pence and Olette's faces. There were tears in the brunette's eyes, her tiny, elegant hands covering her O-shaped mouth in a silent, shocked cry. Pence on the other hand, simply held a mildly surprised expression on his face – an inverse testament to exactly how much the scene before him was disturbing the balance of his mental world.

"Sei… _Seifer_…" he managed out, sounding more aroused than panicked.

"Yes?" the older blond whispered back huskily, pressing roughly against Hayner again, causing the boy to moan into his hair.

"Audience," he forced meaningfully from his voice as his arms resultantly pushed the older male away from his body. However, before Hayner was able to look back at the entrance of the sandlot, his two friends were already gone. Scowling, the young man sat up from underneath Seifer and dusted off his clothes.

"Where are you going?" Seifer demanded as Hayner started leaving.

This time, Hayner didn't answer. He was already too far away to hear the question.

"Olette, Pence, wait!"

His shoes pounded on the sidewalk, desperately thudding against the hard cement. Neither of the two that were called turned. Before him, Pence had one of his arms wrapped soothingly around Olette's shoulder and leaning in close to her to murmur words of comfort to the still crying brunette.

"Olette," Hayner breathed out as he finally reached the pair. "Olette, I'm sorry."

The crying girl only drew in a shuddering breath, the ends of her uneven brown hair shaking along with her body.

"Are… are we not good enough for you?"

Hayner blinked.

_What?_

"Are we not good enough," Olette repeated, sniffing, "to the point where you have to go," she wiped her nose, "find new friends because Roxas left? We're hurting too! Just because you were friends with Roxas first didn't mean that we didn't love him either! And… and why did you never tell us you were gay? We're your friends! Don't you trust us?"

"I wanted to tell you, but-"

The tears Olette shed began falling for a different reason. Her voice turned from sadness to anger as she practically spat out the next slew of hurt filled sentences at the blond.

"No, Hayner," she cried furiously through her tear-streaked face, "I don't want to hear it! I'm sorry but you'll have to come back when you've got a legitimate answer instead of an excuse. I want you to think this over and I won't speak to you or listen to anything you have to say until you find one!"

Before Hayner could get another sound in, the brunette turned and fled down the sidewalk. In a sad attempt to find some form of comfort, Hayner turned to Pence for some sort of response.

"Sorry, man," he tilted his head to the side, "but I'm with Olette on this one."

"It's okay," he whispered as he watched the other boy retreat from the scene and head toward Olette's house to comfort her.

ღஜღ

Hayner opened the door to his house only to find Squall Leonhart sitting at the table with the social worker and Seifer.

"Welcome home, Hay-Hay," the brunet chuckled, feigning familiarity. As much as he loved his uncle, they really hadn't been speaking much in the past year.

"Hey, Squallie," he responded, forcing a smile into his voice.

"It's Leon."

The two of them just laughed. The social worker smiled kindly at Hayner at the door and motioned for him to take a seat.

"Hello, Hayner. How've you been?"

"Pretty good, Aerith. Thanks."

At the table were four sandwiches that Seifer had obviously prepared for them. Hayner sat down, fake smiles and all, and took a bite into the sandwich.

"Alright, so I really just came to check up on how you're doing. Is everything okay here?"

"Yeah," he smiled back at her, "everything's good."

"It's gotten tidier since I was here last time," she commented offhandedly. "Did you start cleaning?"

"That would be thanks to me," Seifer smiled at her.

For only a moment, Hayner's heart stopped when he saw the relaxed, serene expression on the older blond's face. The corners of his eyes wrinkled up lightly and his eyes brightened. Hayner felt like an idiot for missing it before because on the middle of the table sat a picture of him and Seifer with their parents behind them, watching the two boys giggle and fight over a paopu plushie. From the photo's angle and lighting, you could tell that Leon was the one that had taken the picture as Hayner's mother's eyes were looking seemingly beyond the lenses and at her younger brother.

Hayner's parents and Seifer's father had died in a car crash years ago. The two had practically grown up together, their parents being friends from college that ended up both moving to Twilight Town when their jobs had relocated them. Hayner was never sure of what they did for a living, seeing as how he was too young to remember much about them when they had passed away.

Luckily, Seifer's mother was still alive. She hadn't been in the car when they'd crashed because she was home sick with a cold. Seifer, Roxas, and Hayner were at home with Seifer's mom, playing in the older boy's room when they got the call from the police about the crash.

Everything had become hell from then after. Hayner stopped talking to Seifer and his mother after that and Serra (Seifer's mother) had quit her job and decided to begin working at a local café to provide for both her and her son. The year after, Hayner had confessed to Seifer about his crush on Roxas; the same year that two had taken their last picture together.

After the small custody hearing, Hayner ended up being able to stay in his old house as long as his uncle, Squall Leonhart, was able to take care of him. At first, Leon had been living at the house with Hayner, but as the boy grew older (and confided in his uncle about his sexual preference so that he wouldn't have to worry about Hayner getting some girl pregnant), the older man grew more confident in letting Hayner stay home alone. In fact, it had been a year since Hayner started living by himself.

Hours passed and the sun finally set in Twilight Town. Aerith had left just as the bright sphere of light dipped under the line of the town. Another hour later, Leon washed up the dishes and left, content that Hayner was safe. Even though he'd noticed something with off with the boy, he didn't pry. Squall never asked; Hayner never answered.

"So why'd you run off?" Seifer asked.

The two lounged on the couch, idly eating out of the same pint of melting sea salt ice cream. In all honesty, the feeling of just hanging out with the odler male didn't feel as awkward as he would've imagine it to be. If anything, it was _cozy_.

"Pence and Olette. They saw."

"Oh…" Seifer dug his spoon into the pint of the creamy blue treat. "You gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. I'm over it. Give em time and they'll get over it too."

Hayner closed that conversation and reattached his attention to the T.V.

It had been nearly two months now since Roxas had left and the regular visits from the other blond were no longer awkward. Hayner mentally slapped himself when he realized that he'd been coming to expect the visits and actually missed it when Seifer didn't show up.

Now, the two were curled up on the couch, watching The Lion King on the television. Now that it was dark, Hayner was suddenly feeling cold. Seifer must have sensed the temperature drop as suddenly the blanket that always sat bunched up somewhere on the of the couches of the house was snatched away from Hayner and greedily taken to being bundled around the other male.

"Hey!" he protested, tugging at the corner of the blanket.

Seifer smirked and held out a flap of the cloth to him. Hayner reached out for it warily and the two ended up fighting over the blanket like having it was a holy rite the both of them wished to possess. After a particularly hard tug, Hayner was pulled closer to the other blond on the couch, defeated.

"Kicked your ass, lamer."

In response, Hayner playfully plucked the black beanie off of Seifer's head and threw it across the room. For the second time that day, Seifer growled and pounced on Hayner, pinning the smaller boy to the couch cushions. Hayner struggled, but wasn't able to gain the upper hand again. That was when he realized that this time, he didn't _want _to.

Seifer understood the same.

Taking an uneasy dip into the waters, Seifer slipped his hand up the side of Hayner's shirt and began rubbing circles on the skin around his navel.

"You're cold!"

"Shut up," Seifer laughed. "You'll warm me up, won't you?"

"Maybe," he whispered back flirtatiously.

Surprise followed by happiness crossed Seifer's face as he recognized the tone of voice Hayner had just used with him. During the extended second, the two locked eyes and Hayner stopped breathing again. For a moment, as he lost himself on the other boy's blue eyes, he could have sworn that Seifer was going to lean down and kiss him, but alas the blond moved once more to his favorite spot behind Hayner's ear and began nibbling. Still, as Hayner's attention was divided to the spot behind his ear, the image of Seifer's wide, surprised, yet pleased eyes wouldn't leave him mind.

_His eyes are so… so…_

"Beautiful," he whispered.

The breathy word only drew Seifer away from behind his ear and to his face. Those eyes were boring back into his mind again, distracting him from all coherent trains of thought. Suddenly, all trains flew into overdrive as the older blond leaned down and pressed his forehead against Hayner's. He could almost taste the sea salt ice cream on Seifer's lips and breath as the older male leaned in closer and closer and closer…

"You know I want this," Seifer whispered almost against his lips, "but do you want it too, chickadee?"

And without a single doubt in his mind, Hayner closed the distance.

ღஜღ

_I might've fucked up real bad this morning, but damn, did it finally pay off. Chickadee kissed me! Took him long enough, the stupid sexy lamer. Fuck._

_To be honest, I don't think I really give a damn that his friends know. Rai and Fuu already know and they don't give a damn, really. Those two were made for each other: there just isn't enough room for them to care about other shit. They might be loyal, but… damn, I just don't fucking fit in with them sometimes. It kinda makes me wish for the days when chickadee and I were friends; before Roxas, Olette, and Pence came into the picture._

_Yeah, I can use their proper names. What the hell do I look like to you? An uncultured dickhead?_

_… Actually, don't answer that._

* * *

For every review recieved, Seifer pins Hayner to the dusty sandlot floor and has his way with him.

Here's some worthless trivia to the creation of this story: I actually take a shot of a listen to Disturbia (Rihanna... seriously) every time I get writer's block. It always stimulates the plot and my willingness to write this story. Well, that along with talking to Riel-chan on the phone and eating sliced bananas.

_Bisous, Minikimii_

P.S. Hopefully the title of this chapter was okay. I had some problems naming it this time.


	7. What He Wants

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.

If everything stays according to plan, I have only two more chapters to write. Anyways, please enjoy this update!

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**What He Wants

When he'd woken up the next morning, the air around him was cold and empty, void of sound and movement – Hayner knew there was something wrong. Propping his lonely body up by his arms, he leaned over to inspect a napkin on the table with neatly formed handwriting covering most of the front side of the white, ink-bleeding material.

**_I left early because I didn't know how you'd react once you woke up. Here's some time to think about whether or not this is a mistake. Use it well, chickadee.  
-Seifer  
_****_P.S. Left my beanie for ya. Don't get too lonely._**

Beside the note sat Seifer's black Ore beanie, plopping and blobbing formlessly, even contentedly, on the coffee table. With an eye roll and a sigh, the blond gently scooped the cotton cap up with both hands and held it to his face, inhaling the masculine scent that was so distinctly Seifer.

_Seifer…_

His chest clenched as he suddenly felt the sweeping warmth spread through his chest from the spot where the black cotton cap connected through his shirt with his chest. It was nice to know that someone cared for him in a way more than just a friend or a relative, but the fact that Seifer had upped and left before Hayner awoke tossed between the walls of his round cranium, effectively canceling out all thought and eventually itself as Hayner zoned in his senses on the moment until it dulled him over and made his physical state as malleable as moist clay. Burying his face in the couch cushion, he closed his eyes and drifted back into sleep. He would give it more thought in the afternoon.

Sadly, Hayner didn't wake up on his own accord. In fact, the blond teen was jolted awake by a consistently _annoying_ringing of his doorbell. He rolled off the couch onto the floor and stretched, yawning once, before forcing his way past the couch and dining table to the front door. What if it was Seifer?

"Coming, coming!" he called as he passed the table, afraid that if he didn't, the other male would leave without even being seen.

Rubbing his eyes and shaking himself awake, Hayner yanked the door open only to find a very apologetic Pence and Olette standing at his doorstep.

"Oh, it's just you guys," he deadpanned. Surprisingly, Pence laughed.

"Aww? Didn't wanna see us? Aren't you gonna at least _pretend_ that you still like us and invite us inside?"

Even with those words, Hayner knew the brunet was only joking. With a light-hearted response laugh, he stepped aside and waved the couple inside. Olette stepped in first, her face scrunching up involuntarily when she saw Seifer's beanie clutched in Hayner's hand. He's subconsciously held it with him the entire time.

"He was here?" she began, her fists balling up angrily.

"Olette," Pence narrowed his usually cheerful eyes, a warning tone shoving across the space between them until she registered the meaning.

"Oh," she mumbled, "s-sorry, Hayner, I just… I'm not used to…"

"It's fine," Hayner assured her.

The three of them sat down on the couches. Pence and Olette sat together while Hayner took the biggest couch to himself and wrapped the blanket that still smelled vaguely of Seifer around his body. It was funny, really, that now since he knew exactly what he wanted, everything had become sharper and clearer. His mind was no longer a swirling muddle of regret and anger. Somehow, all of the darker storm clouds had parted from his mind leaving only the soft, cotton candy-like chunks, floating and obscuring the deeply known answers to those few questions he had wanted to ask Seifer ever since the first night the other boy had snuck into his room.

"So what brings you two here?"

Pence answered first.

"Well, we ran into Seifer and The Usual Spot and he just told us to go to your house. I mean, it's Seifer and he _never_talks to us, so we figured that if it was him telling us to check up on you, it must be important. Make sense? Anyways, we're both really sorry about the other day. Err… we were just shocked, that's all. I mean, it's not every day you walk down the street and see your best friend and his arch nemesis _grinding_-"

"Pence!"

The two males laughed as Olette's face brightened ribbon red and she slapped her boyfriend's arm.

"Yeah, I suppose that would be pretty scary!" Hayner agreed, smiling. "Well, do you have any questions? Like, what do you want to know?"

"When and why would be nice," Olette started.

"And how."

Olette and Hayner turned to stare at the brunet.

"Wow, Pence, only you would ask 'how'," Hayner commented, earning a giggle-snort from Olette. "Anyway," he continued, "I guess… I never really told you much, did I?" The two brunets nodded. "Err… I'll start here: I've always known I was gay. I mean, even when I was little, I never really looked at girls the way the other boys did. I seriously thought they were just good friends at most. And, you guys know that I moved here from Radiant Garden a while back when they were relocating a bunch of engineers to Twilight Town to build the train. Seifer's parents and my parents were really close and went through high school and college with one another so we grew up together and shit – like best friends, pretty much.

"Then I met Roxas. Seifer just kinda took him in along with me and, well, I'd always admired Seifer so instead of really doing much about Seifer, I just looked up to him and… fell for Rox. It was hard not to, really, because he was like me – not stronger and older like Seifer.

"Did Roxas know?"

"No, he didn't."

Hayner looked up from where he was fiddling with Seifer's beanie, a sudden realization crossing his features: he didn't want Roxas any more. In fact, the blond was probably better off with Axel than he would be with Hayner anyway. Roxas, as feisty as he could be sometimes, needed to be taken care of and probably just wouldn't be emotionally able to handle taking care of Hayner getting into all of his fights all the time. Seifer on the either hand…

"So I finally told Seifer I liked Roxas and hoped that he could help me win Roxas over, but he just… I don't even know what it was. He got up and told me that boys don't like other boys and became friends with Rai and Fuu the next day. Then I met you guys once the school year started and I guess the four of us just clicked.

"But seriously, he just… He just stopped being friends with… me…"

"What, Hayner? Something wrong?"

_How long as he liked me?_

Hayner shook his head to clear it and rubbed at his eyes.

"A-anyways, when Roxas left with Axel, I was sulking. That's why you guys didn't see me for so many days. Looking back, that was actually really stupid. I stopped eating for a while and that was kinda when Seifer started coming in through my bedroom window at night-"

"He _what_?"

"Olette, calm down!" Pence clamped a palm over her mouth as she breathed in heavily through her nose. Glaring, she licked other boy's hand and he squealed and backed off. Hayner couldn't contain the grin coming over his face.

"Actually, now that I think about it, Seifer visiting almost every night really put things into perspective. Like when you guys complimented me on who my bandage wrapping was getting better, that was Seifer's work. The house being clean, me getting out of the house, the food in the fridge – all Seifer. He was here when Aerith-"

"Aerith?"

"Uhh… social worker. Anyways-"

"Social worker? What social worker?"

"Oh, you guys didn't know… uhm, my uncle, Squall-you remember him, yeah? Well, he had legal custody of me. The social worker that was helping me out during the hearing just comes to check on us every once in a while. Her name is Aerith Gainsborough. Anyways, she was here to make sure Leon actually lived with me and Seifer even helped me seem like I didn't live alone so that Leon wouldn't get in trouble. Actually, that was just last night. And he always brings me just the right things to cheer me up. Yeah, sure, he's as annoying and arrogant as fuck sometimes, but… damn, I just don't care really. It's like we're equal, ya know?

"And so last night, we were on this couch and he stole the blanket and I tried to tug it back and one thing led to another and… and I kissed him."

The couple on the other couch stared at him, dumbfounded.

"Err… haven't you kissed him before?" Pence asked.

"Actually, no," Hayner smiled, his gaze traveling lovingly down to the beanie. He fingered the cloth and a fond smile bloomed on his face. "I… I finally kissed him yesterday. It was so… so…"

"Oh my God, Hayner."

" 'Lette?"

"You're happy."

Silence.

Then he realized it. Never once had Hayner been one hundred percent happy with his life before. There was always some reserved sadness in his eyes whenever he hung out with the group. Sure, he'd learned to put on his cheerful mask and maybe fight with Seifer every once in a while, but that didn't mean his best friends didn't see past the mask – they were just too polite to ever say anything.

_He's always been what I needed from him. When I needed a best friend, he was one. When I needed a rival, he filled the spot. And now… when I need a lover, he's… he's perfect for it._

Hayner looked down at the cloth between his fingers and pulled his knees to his chest, bringing the beanie to his face and inhaling Seifer's scent. He closed his eyes and surreptitiously pressed the cloth to his lips.

_Seifer, thank you._

And then…

"I'm hungry."

Hayner opened his eyes to see Pence pouting like a young child as he tugged on Olette's sleeve as immaturely as he could. The trio just laughed and got up from their places on the couches and headed to the kitchen.

_Where are you?_

He hadn't seen Seifer in nearly two weeks.

At first, it really didn't really bother him that there was no contact between the two of them, because he figured that the other boy was still giving him time to think, but that possibility soon when down the drain. In fact, in those short few first three days, Hayner had given the entire ordeal a good thinking out. And the conclusion he came to only consisted of one thing:

Roxas would never be worth it.

Seifer always would be.

In fact, Hayner hadn't so much as given the other blond the grace of a single line of thought for the past few days. Everything his head was filled with now was Seifer and the way he smelled, the way he felt, the way he sounded, the way he tasted… fuck, just the way he _was_ drove Hayner insane. It was just the fact that the older male had left him alone the morning after their first kiss was enough to make Hayner's whimsical smiles turn quickly into angry scowls whenever he made eye contact with the white lettering on the beanie. The whole way the morning after had played out just plain made Hayner want to punch something until it flattened out flatter than dust at the bottom of the deep ocean.

And with that thought, Hayner had been laying in bed once again for the past few days, thinking and only going downstairs periodically to eat the food that Seifer constantly left in his fridge. When the fridge had magically refilled itself, the irrational (read: idiotic) part of his mind practically squealed over the fact that Seifer must have been inside his house, but it soon calmed down when he realized the two of them hadn't met face to face in too long.

He leaned back and kicked his feet up on the couch where only less than two weeks ago Seifer had been laying with him. Olette and Pence gave him worried looks as he frowned up at the ceiling, stretching his arms up and huffing in a manner that would tell anything with half a brain that he was obviously annoyed.

"Fuck this! I'm going out and looking for him _now_."

Pence and Olette jumped at his sudden exclamation (they'd started hanging out at his house again). With a silent agreement, the three of them gathered their things and left Hayner's house to go look for the missing blond.

There was no rushed and panicked running, no frantic calling of names, just the instant beeline to the sandlot.

"People."

The first voice they heard was Fuu's. Hayner could feel his heart speed up as the he neared the entrance of the sandlot, only to have it slow to a near stop when he only saw two figures standing across the lot.

"Where's Seifer?" he demanded the instant he turned the corner.

Rai and Fuu turned to stare at him, the former with an annoyed yet interested spark in his eyes and the latter with a disconnected gaze brimming with boredom. The pair advanced, arms crossed and ever dangerous.

"Why?" Fuu interrogated.

Hayner glared the silverette down until she adverted her gaze and turned to Rai, wearing her equivalent of a smirk.

"What's it to you!"

"We're his friends. Don't think we'll just tell a guy like you where he is without knowing why, ya know?"

" 'A guy like you'? What's that supposed to mean?" Hayner nearly growled while Pence and Olette held him back. "Aww, fuck you! It's none of your fucking business why I wanna see him, and it's not like I'm gong to beat his pretty little ass in! You don't have to worry about that, so just tell me where he is already!"

The two were silent. Hayner blinked rapidly when he realized he'd said 'pretty little ass', but let the words slide from his short-term memory.

"I wanna see him, dammit! Now tell me where the hell he is before I fucking flip a bitch, you fucktards!"

"Hayner," Olette warned, her grip in his arms tightening so that her nails dug into his flesh. "If you keep yelling, they won't tell you."

"Fuck them," he snarled, "I haven't seen Seif in almost two weeks and I'm fucking going through withdrawal here!" Hayner's voice cracked at the last word as he slipped out of his friends' grips and he fell to his knees. "Dammit, I just want to see him… His beanie doesn't even smell like him anymore…"

"You have his hat?"

Hayner looked up to see a worried looking Raijin staring down at him.

"Yeah, it's in my back pocket."

Hayner pulled the black cloth out along with the note that Seifer had left him on the napkin two weeks ago. Rai instantly took the napkin from Hayner's fingers and handed the note to Fuu. The slim girl looked over it twice and gave it back to Hayner. He slipped it along with the beanie back into his pocket.

"Friends?" she asked after she'd finished reading it a third time.

"Yeah, I guess…" Hayner scratched the back of his head nervously. "Do you know where he is?"

The both frowned.

"Lost."

"Oh." _Summer break is over in a month and I haven't talked to him since we hit the middle of it… _"Thanks anyways."

Hayner turned wordlessly and headed back to his house, dejected. Of course, he looked up every time a blond passed him, afraid that perhaps it was Seifer and that the lack of his attention to detail could cost him a precious meeting with the other male.

_So Rai and Fuu don't know where he was either… that's just fan-**fucking**-tastic, isn't it?_

Hayner lay in bed, idly tracing the contours of 'Ore' stitched into the black fabric. He brought the hat up to his face for the millionth time since Seifer had left, kissing the cloth gently as he breathed in what was left of the blond's scent from the hat.

_I'll go see Serra tomorrow about Seifer. His mom should know where he is… right?_

Hayner snuggled deeper into the blankets of his room. Pence and Olette had long since gone home and were probably sleeping soundly in their respective houses.

His minded wandered to Roxas. Was he happy with Axel? How were they doing? Was Axel being a gentleman and taking care of him?

Sleep began leaking into his mind, slowly fuzzing out the edges of all coherent thoughts until he fell into a peaceful meditative state. A single memory floated to the surface of his mind, flowing languidly between reality and the subconscious until he faded into the dream world.

_He was kissing Roxas, the blond wriggling and writhing beneath him as Hayner's hands traveled downward, pleasuring the slimmer boy's body with practiced strokes. In his right ear, he could hear the distorted moans and mewls coming from the other blond's throat as Hayner increased the speed that he was pumping Roxas's arousal. The blond's face was screwed up in perfect pleasure – something that should've made Hayner want the other blond as well, but he felt nothing._

**_Nothing_**_._

_"A-Axel!" the younger boy gasped as he released._

_"No…" Hayner whispered to both himself and Dream-Roxas as he fell against his best friend, "you're not what I want; I'm not what you want."_

_"I know," Dream-Roxas whispered back, "I've always known. I was just waiting for you to realize it. Sure took you long enough."_

_Hayner smiled against Dream-Roxas's neck and kissed him, platonically grateful._

_"Yeah. Took me long enough."_

_Suddenly, there was a more masculine chuckle against his ear and he felt a pressing heat against the back of his body. A rough, calloused hand traveled its way down his body and flipped him onto his back by his hips. He found himself facing his familiar, scar-faced blond. Impulsively, he reached up and pulled the other male down against body and pressed his lips possessively against the other's._

_"Seifer…" he whispered against the other blond's lips as they parted from the kiss._

_Busy hands and lips began moving downward on Hayner's body, touching and pressing against other slighter boy's body until his skin was heated and flushed. Even then, the contact didn't stop. Seifer simply continued his actions, growing hungrier with every touch. Hayner ran his finger through Dream-Seifer's hair, the familiar softness of the strands ticking the webs of his hands as he ran his skin against the hair until his nerve endings tingled happily._

_"Seifer…" he whispered again, the name growing into a moan as he mouthed the last syllable as Dream-Seifer's attention was refocused to the aching spot between his thighs. "Seifer, Seifer, Seifer Seifer Seiferseifer…"_

* * *

For every review recieved, Hayner dreams about Seifer again.

I read Sensitive Pornograph by Aishika Sakura and I was about to cry at the end. Now I understand how Lady Karai could've pulled out a Cleon from Come Home. I'm just glad that she made the wife Aerith though because I don't think I'd be able to stand Cloud leaving Leon for a drunk-ass bitch. -sighs- For anyone looking for a good cry, go read it at www. the spectrum . net. Graphic images warning though, because I actually had to skip past most of the smut when I got uncomfortable.

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	8. Through Glass

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
Please Enjoy~!

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat  
**Through Glass

Hayner slid his way back into consciousness to the sound of hollow constant tapping from across his room. The bored, metronome-like rhythm crescendoed into his mind and snapped his senses into overdrive the moment the vibrations reached his ears carrying the urgent message to wake up. Hayner quickly bolted into a sitting position and soon after to his feet, rubbing each of his eyes in turn with conviction as he crossed his room to throw open the sliding glass cover of his window.

The town always held a somewhat sweet, scent, as strange and contradictory as it seemed according to its appearance. The underlying scent of the musky train station a few blocks away drifted through his window and mixed with whatever aromas were left over from his dinner that night. Seifer came in along with the rush of the warm, summer, Twilight Town night air smelling of everything fresh and naturally… twilight-y.

Whatever that was.

Although he thought he would've been overjoyed at the sight of his current paramour coming through the window yet again late at night, instead he found himself slamming his right fist straight into his love's face.

"Where the _hell_ have you been?" he yelled after the sound of skin slamming against skin sounded in the previously lonely room.

Seifer stumbled back and his back hit the wall beside the window dangerously close to Hayner's desk. Irritation clear on his face, the older blond kicked off his shoes and slid them with his feet, upright against the bottom of the window.

"Around!" Seifer spat back through the painful throbbing in the left side of his jaw. "Giving you time to think that apparently you aren't very grateful for!"

He attempted to advance another step only to have a second punch landed painfully on his upper body.

"Well… why the hell did you think I'd need time to think?"

Hayner glared at him, unsure of exactly why he was getting so pumped up and angry at the older male. Even though he was too scared to say it, Seifer picked up immediately on the 'why' before the slighter blond even had a shot at figuring it out. To put it simply: Hayner had missed him.

Good thing that wasn't a one-way street.

"Isn't it obvious? I thought you'd need sometime for it, because, I mean, you've been in love with Roxas since we were kids!" Seifer reasoned. Hayner kicked him. "What was that for?"

Seifer tried to punch back while holding his wounded jaw, arm, and leg (because apparently that's physically possible), but failed miserably. He glared none the bit lovingly at his lover, the feel of the air around him synchronizing with that of Hayner's. Without stopping his momentum, Hayner launched another assault on the blond's body and landed a punch on Seifer's other arm that was forceful enough to hurt Hayner's fist in backlash.

"And what the _fuck_ was that one for?"

Although the bigger male was obviously angry, Hayner could see the reserved worry in his eyes the moment they made contact.

"Because," Hayner hissed back, tears forming in his eyes, "I wanna know what the hell you see in me to be able to fucking suck me off before we even kiss and then leave me without a word of verbal contact for nearly two weeks!"

"It's because I love you, you fucking _idiot_!"

The words rang through Hayner's mind as the blond bully smashed him against the wall of his bedroom, his bare backside shifting with rough friction against the dry, monotonous walls of the ever ordinary two-story house.

"Then why the hell did you leave?" he growled. "Tell me that, will ya, Seif? Why the fucking _hell_ did you _leave_?"

The both of them knew that this time, Hayner wasn't asking for the mental reason behind Seifer's absence, but the intangible, unexplainable reason that could only be expressed through communication that ran stronger and deeper than the core of the world itself – communication of the heart.

Seifer leaned forward so that his split lip hovered a few inches away from the younger male's. Slowly, he closed the distance between their foreheads and brought his mouth nearer and nearer to Hayner's, drawing the sound of a small intake of breath from his childhood crush.

"Fuck…" he whispered, only brushing against Hayner's soft, heated lips with his own bleeding, chapped pair. "I'm… I'm sorry, okay?"

Seifer broke the contact between the two of them and took to standing against the wall beside Hayner. With a huff, the younger blond crumpled to the floor, inspecting his knuckles that were no doubt bruised. With a surreptitious glance upward, he saw a bit of red trickling down the side of Seifer's chin. Had he really punched that hard? After thinking it out for a few minutes, he came to the conclusion that he's punched a bit too hard and probably forced part of the inside of Seifer's mouth to be cut open by his teeth.

"What?"

Seifer took in a deep breath and began his explanation.

"I fucking see what I _want_ in you – and in both senses of the word. I see everything and nothing. I see chickenwuss and chickadee.

"Fuck, I mean, I know about your 'rents and Roxas and all, so… shit. Hayner, I just don't want to be the last maybe good thing you've got left that leaves you! So 'scuse me if I can't keep a hold of myself any longer and just go and suck you off because I thought you needed it. I just can't fucking help that you're… _you_."

To put it simply: Hayner was stunned. Seifer slid down the wall carefully to join his best friend on the floor, and for the first time since the other teen had entered the room, Hayner was silent.

"Just like I can't help that I'm attracted to that."

And as simple as that, Hayner turned to Seifer and brushed a kiss against the older boy's lips briefly before pulling back and blushing. He flicked a tongue out and licked up the small patch of Seifer's blood that had trailed and pressed onto his own lips.

Proffering an inviting and helpful hand to the injured blond, Hayner stood and waited for Seifer to join him. To his great pleasure, Seifer grabbed onto his hand and lifted himself up off the floor and into Hayner's arms.

"Fucking chickadee…" Seifer whispered, taking a nip at Hayner's earlobe in the process.

"Let's get you cleaned up," he chuckled, ignoring his boyfriend's actions and breaking the hug.

"Whatever."

Seifer followed him to the bathroom across the hallway where he was instantly ordered to strip and sit on the toilet seat cover. Hayner was forced to gawk helplessly as he began making uhn-tiss noises in the back of his throat while swaying his hips like he was doing a strip tease.

"Dammit, don't mess around."

Hayner stepped over to the flamboyant (_wow, I'd have never thought I'd ever be using that word when I thought of **Seifer**. He was a pretty playful kid though, if I remember correctly…_) blond and placed his hands on the older teen's hips to get him to stop. Seifer, however, had other plans and continued swinging his hips. Blood was rushing unrelentlessly to his face as the older male wouldn't stop and threw off his belly shirt and began working on his drawstring pants.

"S-seifer!"

The older male laughed and stopped, moving around Hayner so that he obediently sat on the toilet seat cover. Hayner could feel Seifer eye's on his body when his shirt rode up as he was reaching for something out of the top of medicine cabinet. He soon gathered the medical supplies and positioned himself in front of Seifer and began treating the cuts on the older boy's face.

"That looks uncomfortable," Seifer murmured as Hayner was bent over at the waist, trying to treat Seifer's wounds while simultaneously remaining standing.

"Hmm?"

Hayner let out a little yelp as he was pulled into Seifer's lap.

"That position looked uncomfortable," Seifer explained, the tone of his voice suggesting that the way he was acting was completely normal, "and you keep stabbing my cheek at an awkward angle. Just do it from here."

_Well, if you wanna play dirty…_

Sans argument, he complied and continued his treatment of Seifer's cuts. However, as he turned to the left to take more supplies off the sink, he simultaneously pressed his hips against Seifer's body and continued slowly rolling them softly against the other boy's when he resumed treating his injuries. Just as he was slowly becoming aroused, he could also see the hunger in Seifer's eyes grow with every passing second. Keeping a straight face, Hayner continued moving himself closer to the older teen until their bodies were pressed flush against each other's. Hayner could feel heat stem from the places where their skin made contact and filter through to the rest of his being, filling up any and every need in the way that only Seifer was ever able to do.

"Stupid chickenwuss."

As quickly as the words had left Seifer's lips, Hayner was picked up by his hips and shoved against the wall of the bathroom. His lips were captured and claimed in a rough kiss as hand began fumbling with the hem of his shirt. The cloth was pushed up and off his body as Seifer's hands continued exploring all of his upper body. His mouth was forced open and soon he found himself hotly swapping saliva with his childhood best friend, their lips and tongues meeting in a way physically indescribable.

The shorter blond closed his eyes only momenratily losing himself in the sensation of Seifer's breath playing over his lips and in his mouth. His shivered as the other boy's hands sent rough tingles all over his body while the ripples of pleasured shock stemmed from just below his stomach.

While Hayner tugged off Seifer's pants, the older blond's lips and tongue left his mouth and began working their way down to his neck, attacking the flesh almost violently. There would definitely be a mark there in the morning. The hands that were at his chest moved down to the waistband of his pajama bottoms and tugged down. Seifer ground his hips against Hayner, the feeling of the friction in his lower regions combined with the sucking upon his neck pulling several moans of Seifer's name from his lips. Ever brush and grip was as delightful as the last, the feelings and the simplicity of being wanted in such a way only adding to the euphoria of the moment.

"You're covered in sweat," Seifer commented between kisses.

With a chuckle, he pulled the younger boy into the shower with him, reaching out with one hand to turn the handle that controlled the water on. Cold liquid hit their heated skins causing them to simultaneously shudder against each other's bodies. As the water slowly changed temperature and reached a nice, soothing warmth, the two of them continued their desperate need for physical contact.

He flicked out his tongue and traced the stinging cut on Seifer's cheek, earning the one and only breathy moan he would hear that night from the previously stoic blond's lips. Fully aroused, Hayner was pressed against the wall and braced himself as Seifer readied his fingers with saliva and began preparing him as gently as he could with the warmth of the shower water sliding over their bodies. He shivered and his eyes twitched shut as the initial pain spiked in his body, a whimpering noise sounding from his throat.

"Shh… Relax."

Seifer's voice came from somewhere beside his right ear. The hotness of his breath was infelt as the trickling streams continued to pour all around their bare bodies, creating a constant, soothing atmosphere of little misting water droplets and steam. The warmth around Hayner relaxed him as he adjusted to the feeling of one finger inside him, almost unmoving as the two of them joined efforts to carefully prepare Hayner so that his first time bottoming wouldn't be so painful.

Slowly, as the rushing water swept past his skin, he knew the muscles in his backside were loosening, stretching and, lubricated now by the water around them, preparing for Seifer's entrance.

Hayner's arms almost slipped as Seifer slid into him, the pain from the larger intrusion quickly turning into pleasure as Seifer rocked into him from behind. With his forearms braced against the shower wall and his body bent at the waist, Hayner was barely able to breathe as his lover began rocking his hips back and forth, sliding in and out of Hayner's body. A hand pleasured and teased Hayner in the front, adding to the sensation of unadulterated pleasure filling even the most miniscule of crevices in his body and creating the most ambrosial friction he had ever experienced in his life.

As their bodies moved together, under the spray and flow, Hayner could no longer register the mental slipping away of the memories of his previous sexual experiences. Nothing could compare to this, this first time with Seifer of all people. Losing the last of his grip on reality, Hayner focused into the moment, the pure, simple, primal instinct of feeling taking over his mind, body, and soul. Together, they rose above their senses and came falling down along with one another's bodies as they released in heavy breaths from happily aching muscles and spirits.

"Let me wash you," Seifer whispered into his ear. Hayner only nodded and allowed for the older male to take his exhausted body in his arms. He closed his eyes and let the strong hands scrub the soap all over his body with a washcloth, enjoying the feeling of being held and pampered for the first time too many lonely years. Soon, the smell of his comforting, fruity shampoo invaded his nostrils. The suds from the shampoo fell over his cheeks and down his neck while Seifer's strong hands took turns with cleansing his own body and his lover's body.

Inside the large shower, with only the water falling in warm, consistent streams around them, with the smell of hygienic chemicals and post-sex spice enveloping their senses, he smiled and came to the beginning of a realization.

Several hours would pass before the two would be lying beside each other, their bodies joined in intimate proximity for the third time that night. Their different shades of blond hair would be shower-soaked and drying on Hayner's bed sheets, their lips caught, held, and waiting for the short moment when they both would run out of air and have to part for the mutual safety of their health.

For the first time in his life, Hayner found himself simply happy. He was _there_, within the moment, with a pure, simply, pulsating, and concentrated bliss balled up in the unreachable center of his being and the warm, strong arms of the one person he belonged to around him, not protecting him from the world, but rather supporting him within it.

Somewhere outside of Twilight Town, a redheaded flamer and his young, chocobo-headed boyfriend smiled at each other as they watched the sunrise. Sharing a brushing soft kiss, they both wondered if Hayner was all right.

Thank God he was.

ღஜღ

_People always told me childhood romances never worked out, that love doesn't exist. Ya know what I say to that?_

_Fuck._

_You._

_I've got all the proof I need right here and your bitching ain't gonna change a thing._

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For every review recieved, Hayner and Seifer ravish each other to the point where one or both of them pass out. :)

So this is the last 'chapter' of the story. All that's left is the epilogue. I've had one heck of a time writing this story, honestly... but I'll save those notes for after the entire thing is said and done. :D

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	9. Epilogue

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.  
Here's the Epilogue! Just one more chapter and everything will be finished for good. Oh and by the way:

**MAJOR CONTENT WARNING:** This applies to the entire last one third of this chapter and includes masochism and bondage. Not for the faint of heart.

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**Rinse and Repeat  
**Epilogue

Hayner looked across the Sandlot, his eyes grazing the low skyline of the city as he took in the colors of the sunset for the first time in years. His senior year of high school was pretty much the most awkward experience of his life because by the time the school year had started, the entire student body had known about his relationship with Seifer. Luckily, the two of them didn't receive the same animosity Axel and Roxas had. Due to the fact that either of them could probably beat anyone who threatened the within an inch of their lives, the happily abusive couple had been mostly ignored and left to do as they pleased.

"You ready to go?" Seifer asked.

Coming up behind Hayner and draping his arms around his lover's shoulders was a habit the scarred blond had picked up over the years. Although the two of them had gotten better with words (practice makes perfect, mind you) they still subconsciously preferred the tried and true method of saying 'I love you' – through touch.

"Yeah," Hayner responded, playing with his lover's fingers that rested limp before his face. "Now let's get going. Don't want to lose our reservation."

They'd come back to Twilight Town after a few years of going out and exploring the world. They'd gone back to Radiant Gardens where Hayner studied child psychology at the university there for a few years and Seifer was able to transfer his credits to complete and further his degree in the same field. Even through Hayner's foreign exchange program to Destiny Islands for one year and Seifer's two consecutive summers spent at Hallow Bastion's psychology program, the couple remained faithful and trusting with one another.

Even _if_ their main arguments toward one another were: "Who'd wanna fuck someone like you?" and "Kissing you is like… like suicide. Only angsting teens think about it and you're not a pedophile."

It was only a few months ago that Pence and Olette had written to Hayner calling him and his lover back to the town for a reunion between friends. Luckily, Hayner hadn't sold his home and the couple had returned to Twilight Town without needing to scout for a place to stay. Seifer's mother, Serra, would have gladly offered, but before she could get more than half a word out of her mouth, Seifer had cut her off and told her he was staying at Hayner's. She only chuckled and waggled her eyebrows at them.

"So we're eating at the Pared Paopu?"

"Yeah."

Seifer laughed at the name of the restaurant. "Seriously, couldn't they come up with something other than 'Pared Paopu'? It sounds like they're trying too hard."

Hayner rolled his eyes.

"God, you're so opinionated and _pushy_ some times…"

"But you like it 'pushy', don't you?" Seifer leaned over and murmured into his ear.

Hayner laughed along, bumping his lover in the shoulder casually as they walked down the sidewalk. Although the two of them were dressed in what was considered formal wear, they both had the top buttons of their shirts undone except Hayner was the only one sporting a loosely draped black tie.

Seifer's had been long lost as a casualty in the Great Tie Themed Bondage Party (Invite Only) two years ago.

"We're here," Hayner breathed, peeking into the dimly lit restaurant.

"Jeez, this place gives me the fucking creeps. Seriously, who can stand eating in such a dark place? I'd probably fork my eye out before I'd get even a nibble of the hors d'oeuvres."

Seifer shuddered for good measure.

The pair ducked into the restaurant, trying to remain inconspicuous as they scouted the darkness for Pence and Olette. Their eyes landed on a couple a ways away from the front entrance waving frantically at them like their arms were going to pop off at any given second.

Hayner smiled back and waved. Seifer only nodded in their direction after he saw Rai and Fuu sitting at the same table. The couple merged with the group at the table, the six of them re-seating themselves comfortably at the round booth.

"So what've you guys been up to lately? Other than getting along with each other and getting to be friends and all."

"Right," Fuu rolled her eyes and Olette nudged her. Even though she'd hate to admit it, Fuu didn't care that they were sitting practically elbow to elbow. In fact, the two of them looked natural together, like they'd been sitting in that arrangement for years now.

Which they probably had.

Hayner looked to his right to see Seifer in a low conversation with Rai. Only snippets of their voices consisting of mostly Struggle and Fuu reached Hayner's ears. Feeling a bit ignored, Hayner collapsed his head into his folded arms atop the table and closed his eyes to listen to the hum and buzz of quiet chatter in the restaurant.

The waitress came by the table, only taking Seifer and Hayner's drink orders before leaving as quickly as she had come.

_What the hell? No ordering food?_

With a sigh, the blond propped his elbows up on the table and lifted his head to fold his hands under his chin.

Giving the round table arrangement a second glance, he noticed how close everyone on the opposite end of the table were really sitting. For some reason, he'd followed suit and scooted in as close to Seifer as possible so that there was room for more people to join him on his left.

"Seems to be a lot of free space here," Hayner commented off-handedly.

"Yeah. But we'll take care of that, won't we?"

He looked up from the center of the table and up to a pair of familiar bright blue eyes that laughed with a relaxed joy he hadn't seen in years..

"Rox? What the fuck! I haven't seen your ass in so damn long!" he pulled the spiky-headed blond into a rough hug. "Shit, I've missed you like hell."

All around the restaurant, couples in the middle of romantic evenings looked up and glared at Hayner for the profanity. He grinned back just to spite them.

"Thanks?" the man laughed back, returning Hayner's enthusiastic hug.

The two blonds sat down and settled themselves into their seats confortably only to be interrupted by the sudden presence of Axel's ass against Roxas's lap.

"Hey there, baby," the redhead cooed, wrapping his arms around his chocobo-headed partner's neck.

"Get offa me!" Roxas blushed and shoved the man off his body. Hayner only laughed as the man fell gracefully to the empty seat on their left.

"Nice to see you again, lamer," Seifer smirk-grinned, holding a hand out to shake Roxas's.

"You too, asshole."

Subsequently, the three blonds began talking about their high school years, then what they'd been doing during their times apart. As time stretched on, Seifer actually began befriending Axel and Hayner found that perhaps the redhead wasn't so bad after all.

When the appetizers came, Hayner found himself being pulled up by his collar and toward the restroom by one very determined-looking Roxas. Even though Olette had begun passing the hand sanitizer around the table, the blond insisted on going to the restroom to wash his hands.

"So… Seifer, huh?" he asked, once they were in the restroom alone.

"Yes, Seifer," he responded, chuckling at how Roxas was staring at him still after half an hour of watching the two of them together.

Roxas leaned over the sink and tweaked the ornate knob to the let the water flow begin through the pipes.

"You guys don't act any differently than how you used to when we were a trio."

_As lame as the name of the restaurant is, they sure have some nice smelling soap_, Hayner noted, chuckling at his own silliness for even thinking the thought in the first place.

"Yeah, I know."

"I'm sorry for leaving you, Hayner." The blond looked up and into his old friend's apologetic eyes. "I know you liked me and... I guess I didn't want you hurting about me and Axel being together and there were the stupid homophobes that always picked on us and my parents being total douchebags and... I'm rambling aren't I?"

Hayner laughed.

"Yeah, you kind of are."

"Well... err... anyways," Roxas chuckled weakly, unable to hide the grin of embarassment on his face, "I kind of didn't want to know about what it was like for you after I left. Truth is, I'm a bit ashamed for running away like that. Pence, Olette, Rai, and Fuu all told me what happened with you for the month after I left."

"So you know, huh?"

"Yeah. Sorry about what I-"

Instead of being angry like Roxas had predicted he would be, Hayner reached over and placed two delicate fingers under his chin. Roxas blinked away the rapidly forming tears and looked into the taller blond's warm, coffee eyes.

"It's alright," Hayner whispered. He leaned in and kissed Roxas on the lips, completely platonic, as a comforting sign from the days when it was Roxas who would come stumbling through his bedroom window, eyes filled with tears, and not Seifer who would come prancing in to comfort Hayner in any way the blond needed. "I got Seifer out of it after all and I couldn't be happier."

"Yeah," Roxas smiled and kissed him back once, slipping his arms around Hayner's body. "We never really would've matched anyways. As much fun as it is, topping just isn't for me and I _know_ you and Seifer are probably way freakin' crazy in bed anyways."

Hayner just laughed and ruffled his hair in response.

The desserts reached the table and the evening closed with the blonds finally reminiscing about the old days when their main friend trio really only consisted of each other, bringing up stories about the times when Roxas started crying during the middle of the night of their first sleepover because he thought Seifer's beanie was a giant spider and Hayner's first Struggle win against Seifer where he got so excited he tripped on literally nothing and landed with his face awkwardly in Seifer's crotch (at which point Pence snickered and made some sort of dirty comment across the girls to Rai earning him his smack upside the head by one very embarrassed Olette).

"Yeah, and right after the two of you got up off the floor, Seifer was all like…" Roxas's voice trailed off into laughter as he was unable to finish the story.

Seifer graciously took up the duty to finish the embarassing tale.

"I think I said –"

"Oh come on, Seifer, don't say it!" Hayner begged, holding his face in his hands.

"– I said, 'even if you win you still blow' or something to that effect."

Reaching above the two shorter blonds' heads, Axel high-fived the ex-bully.

"Bitch," Hayner hissed at his lover as he watched Pence burst a fit of laughter.

"But you love me for it, chickenwuss."

"Yeah, yeah… I love you just as much as you love taking it up the ass then, right?" he crossed his arms and grinning cockily at his lover.

Across the table, six mouths silenced and twelve eyes fell onto Seifer's lightly flushing face. Hayner simply leaned over and kissed Seifer on the jaw, smirking as he leaned back to watch the three couples' expressions draw into various degrees of shock.

"You guys have _no_ idea what he's like in bed."

In that one statement alone, a whole new round of conversation was opened up. And just because they were all older did not mean that the conversation was any more mature than it would have been four years ago, just less awkward.

ღஜღ

"Am I really that amazing in the sack?" Hayner laughed as he pulled his lover in through the front door of his old house, the two of them discarding their jackets the moment they walked through the door.

"Yes," Seifer whispered hotly against Hayner's neck as he bit down. "Yes, you are. But you're not topping tonight; you're going to be punished for what you said today in public."

No more words could be exchanged as Hayner was shoved against the door hard enough for his back to sting. His wrists were gathered up above his head as his lover rubbed his knee against the quickly hardening spot between Hayner's legs and one hand began moving down his body, unbuttoning the few remaining intact buttons of the slighter blond's dress shirt. Harsh teeth began attacking his torso, sucking and biting every known area of sensitivity hard enough to almost draw the occasional streams of blood.

All the while, Seifer had begun pushing Hayner toward the living room couch without making much progress. With an angry growl, Seifer finally decided to drag him there by his tie like a master would do with a disobedient dog using a leash.

"On your knees," Seifer ordered.

Instead of following his lover's orders, Hayner simply stood there, a playfully defiant grin darkening his face.

"I said," Seifer repeated, pulling off his own shirt and advancing toward Hayner, "_get_ on your fucking _knees_."

Only being met with resistance, Seifer was quickly growing both frustrated and aroused. Seifer's Struggle-worn hands finally turned around his loose tie and bound his wrists in a way that his two hands were caught prisoner beside the front of his neck, under his jaw. With his lover sufficiently tied up, he led Hayner to the couch and sat down, with Hayner's body and bulging erection straight in front of his face. A wicked smile atop his lips, Seifer leaned forward and unzipped his lover's pants, tugging the black cloth down swiftly to reveal that Hayner had gone the night commando.

"Suck," Seifer ordered as he blindly brought his fingers toward Hayner's lips. The younger blond's tongue found his digits as he felt the liquid drip down his palm and wrist.

The sensation of Hayner's tongue pushing against his fingers as the walls of his mouth enclosed even a portion of his body caused Seifer to grow more needy and even violent by the passing second. Runing his hands all over his lover's toned torso, he scraped his nails along the tan skin leaving trails of broken red streaks in their wake.

After deciding that he'd had enough of a replacement lubricant on his hands, he retracted his hand and positioned his finger at Hayner's entrance. Without any warning, Seifer took an experimental lick at his lover's arousal, his practiced tongue sliding just barely within the beginning dips of his slit while he simultaneously slid his finger inside his lover. Hayner groaned while the warm wetness and pressing softness of Seifer's tongue flicked and pressed against him and attempted to move his hands down to fist in Seifer's hair only to be sadly restricted by the bindings on his wrists and neck.

As Seifer moved his head forward, he moved his finger in and out in synchronized time, Hayner could feel the lightheaded sensations of pleasure taking over his body. Flushed and wanting from the ripples and ribbons of pleasure wrapping around his senses, he let out another low groan of encouragement for his lover to take him in deeper. Hayner's body shook as the other male took in the his length level by level, moving his head back and forth as he gradually allowed more and more of the hardening flesh entrance to his mouth. The sounds coming from the back of Hayner's throat made Seifer's mind swim in a dulled over ecstasy, knowing only the movement of his body and the feeling of Hayner's hips rocking back and forth in time with his own dance.

He almost grinned to himself as he heard Hayner's throaty whine ride up in pitch, signaling his nearing of his release. Quickly, Seifer pulled away from and out of Hayner's body, leaving the fully erect blond quite pissed.

Seifer, on the other hand, quickly slipped out of his remaining clothes and threw them across the room. Before Hayner could do anything in response, the dominant male of the night had already grabbed his lover's wrist and pulled him atop his own body on the couch.

"Bitch," Hayner hissed as he Seifer readjusted their positions so that he was pushed over and around until he was straddling Seifer's lap.

"Ride me," Seifer ordered.

Without hesitation, Hayner complied and slowly lowered his body onto Seifer's arousal. The meager stretching and lubrication from the blowjob gave him only a limited preparation as a splitting pain invaded his senses at the feel of the intrusion.

The usual tears formed in the corners of his eyes as he began moving his body up and down, the pain mixing in with the pleasure with every descending of his body onto Seifer's. His stomach muscles clenched, the deeper cut marks on his torso began oozing more blood that mixed with his sweat and trailed down to where Seifer and Hayner's skin met. The feeling of being filled to the brim and his blood slowly trickling out the wounds Seifer had made on his body shoved him into a natural high from sex and the beginnings blood-loss. With every slam of his body against Seifer's, another wave of pure ecstasy washed over him until he was drowining in his own pleasure, knowing nothing but the feeling of friction and passion and the sound of Seifer's name on his own voice.

As the thrusts became more erratic, Hayner could feel the small tear in the back of his tie splitting until the fibers of the cloth were begging to be split by the force of his arms against its rough fabric. As Seifer grabbed onto his hips and trust up particularly hard, Hayner's tie could no longer stand the force from his arms and split with a loud ripping sound.

With his arms free at last and his hands still manacled together, Hayner scooped his arms behind Seifer's head and forced the man beneath him to lean up into a sitting position. With his head caught between Hayner's tied wrists, Seifer crashed his lips against Hayner's and left trailing, open-mouthed kisses along Hayner's chest, the soft warmth of his tongue licking at the wounds that he had made earlier on Hayner's body. Seifer's large hand wrapped around his pulsating arousal, pumping and squeezing at irregular intervals that made Hayner's body tip precariously over the edge. The feeling of Seifer's tongue lapping at Hayner's raw flesh, the hand that applied constant pressure and pleasure to the ache between his legs, combined with the constant slamming together of their hips sent waves of pleasure that prickled all over his nerve endings, making him go euphorically light headed.

The knot that had formed in his throat burst as Seifer rocked his body repeated against the nerves deep inside his body. Hayner could feel his chest heaving and his lungs collapsing in after breathing so hard. With one final cry from his vocal chords, Hayner released into Seifer's hands just as the older man bit down on his neck, their orgasms converging and melting into one.

Exhausted to the core, Hayner collapsed against Seifer's chest, his bound arms still and unresponsive as he weakly nuzzled his face into the unmarred crook between Seifer's shoulder and neck. His wrists and the back of his neck were rubbed raw from the friction of the rough cloth on his bare skin. With tender care, Seifer untied the knot he'd made and allowed Hayner's wrists freedom from their constricts. He held Hayner's chaffed wrists tenderly and kissed the back of his hands.

"Shit," Hayner breathed as he looked to exactly what was lying beneath them.

"What?" Seifer inquired as he traced his fingers over the numerous scarring marks he had made on his lover's body. Hayner flinched slightly as Seifer's fingers ran over a particularly deep bite his lover had made.

"Our blood and cum stains aren't gonna come out of the couch cushions."

The pair chuckled lightly, Hayner's head resting on Seifer's shoulder. Slowly, he felt his eyelids droop and his mind go blisfully empty as he slipped into an exhausted sleep atop his lover's body.

Yeah, this was definitely where he always belonged.

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For every review received, Hayner and Seifer have more kinky, masochistic black-tie-bondage smax on the couch.  
Now, before you click on the nect chapter button, I'd like to give everyone a great big thanks for staying with this story as long as you did. It moved a little fast I'll admit, but I had so much fun writing it, I don't think it particularly matters. -laughs-

By the way, there's still a bonus chapter left for me to post so stick around for that little one, too. (I guess I'm just delaying writing the ending notes then. XD)

_Bisous, Minikimii_


	10. Rinse and Repeat

Disclaimer: KH belongs to SquareEnix.

This is the very last update I'm ever going to make for Rinse and Repeat. It's a bittersweet moment, but... Please enjoy. :)

* * *

**Rinse and Repeat**

Trying not to wake the blond whose arms were wrapped around his waist, head nuzzled in his hip, Hayner slid slowly into a semi-upright position. His head was slightly propped up on his pillow and he could see over his chest and the bed sheets slipped off his torso and onto Seifer's still head because of the slight movement. In his min, Hayner's thoughts were fuzzy with memories of Seifer's body being pressed against his, pressed inside his from the night before. With a smile and a sigh, Hayner initiated his methodical leave of the bed.

That, however, failed the moment he began _really_ moving.

"I'm already awake."

The younger blond jumped at the sound of Seifer's voice, only to have his hips held down by a pair of strong arms as to prevent him from fully getting up.

"The fuck, Seif!"

The older blond chuckled and lowered his lips to Hayner's abs, brushing the tight skin gently with his lips. Hayner shivered, his senses tingling due to the fact that he was hopelessly sensitive in area around his torso. Hayner cocked his head in confusion, his hands automatically reaching for Seifer's hair as he mindlessly started playing with the light strands.

"Err… what are you doing?" Hayner asked, blushing from his long-term partner's behavior.

"Don't you remember?"

"Huh?"

Seifer laughed and rested his chin on his lover's hard abs.

"Don't you ever remember? What I used to do to you when we were kids?"

"You mean when you used to tickle me by brushing my sides when we were little? And when you straddled me in the middle of Struggle tournaments…"

Hayner scrunched up his face and pouted childishly, only to be pulled closer to the larger blond so that his face was nuzzled deeply into Seifer's chest. Slowly, his mind traced back to the times before when Seifer used to pin him down to any nearby bed and tickle the daylights out of him. Those memories slowly melted into Hayner being pinned down onto the ground during Struggle matches and brawls in the Sandlot. Now that he thought about it, every time Seifer was on top of him there would always be this slightly off grin and a flushed cheeks and busy hands wander around the waistband of his...

"Oh my _God_, you were feeling me up!"

"Yeah."

Hayner's eyes widened to the degree of 'scandalized'.

"When we were in elementary school!"

"Yeah. So?"

Seifer lay there, grinning down at Hayner with a playful glint in his eyes. Hayner's blush deepened and pounded his balled up fists on Seifer's chest repeatedly, causing the older blond to chuckle.

"Shit, Seifer! Just how long have you liked me?"

There was a silence and Hayner watched his boyfriend's lips twitch into a thoughtful partial smirk.

"Since the moment our eyes met," the blond concluded, his finertips grazing Hayner's chin and tipping his face up for a kiss.

That only earned him a light swat upside the head.

"Liar," Hayner huffed good-naturedly, pushing aside Seifer's hand and closing the distance between them for a kiss.

It was nice, honestly, to be able to laugh like this with Seifer. And as much as he laughed, kidded, and protested on the outside, in the back of his mind, Hayner had already taken his lover's statement to heart.

ღஜღ

"Hayner, this is Seifer – my best friend Serra's son."

Little four-year-old Hayner looked up at the towering blond before him with wide, innocent chocolate eyes. Despite his not-so-pudgy-anymore cheeks and the competitive glint the older boy held in his expression, Hayner couldn't help but instantly like him. He would be a friend Hayner could have a lot of fun with.

"I'm Hayner," he introduced himself, detaching his hand from his mother's and holding it out for the other boy to take.

"My name's Seifer." He took the other boy's hand a shook it 'like a man', which meant full eye contact and with a firm grip, just the way his father had taught him to. "Did you know your hair is the color of a chicken?"

Little Hayner pouted and retracted his hand from the older blond's. He propped his tiny fists on his narrow hips and 'hmph'-ed once.

"So?" he challenged, glaring cutely at the older boy.

"Be nice, honey," Serra patted her son on the head and he swatted her hand away.

"I _was_ being nice, mama. I like chickens; they're cute! 'Specially the baby ones. The… The chick… chickadees! Yeah, the chickadees, right? Those things are really cute."

Little Hayner suddenly cocked his head to the side, the green paopu-print blanket in his right hand flopping and dragging along the floor.

"Am I cute too?" he wondered aloud.

Young Seifer smiled as he took the boy by the hand and led him to his bedroom to show him the new legos his mother had bought for their playdate. Little Hayner followed obediently hugging his blanket close to his chest.

"Yeah," he replied. "Yeah, you are, chickadee."

Little Hayner blushed.

"S-So… do you like to Struggle?"

A week later, Little Hayner leapt onto the bed, his tiny fists clutched to a blue and white pillow. From across the room, Seifer and shut the door quickly, swooping in on the younger blond, hands ready in an attack. He leapt onto the bed and began tickling the living daylights out of his best friend, not caring that their mothers were laughing their heads off and banging on the door, wondering exactly what was going on inside.

All anyone could hear in the air was the sound of two distinctly different kinds of laughter. Where Seifer's was a suppressed snicker-smirk of some sort, Hayner's was full-blown joy in its most potent form. Still, the two different expressions of happiness were simply sounds that belonged together.

Outside their room, the two mothers smiled to each other, nodding about the agreement they'd made back in college.

"They sound like they're having fun," Hayner's mother commented.

"Yeah, Lucia," she smiled back, giving her best friend a platonic kiss on the cheek.

"They probably don't know any better right now," Serra commented, smiling a bit sadly as she watched them run back to Siefer's room. "Do you think they'll still be like this when they're older? I mean..."

"Hey," Lucia interrupted, pressed the tip of her finger to her best friend's lips, "don't worry so much. I mean, even though we didn't have a daughter and a son, we agreed to raise them to be open-minded right? So even if they don't... well, there's still a chance, so don't sweat it."

The two shared an amused giggle as sounds of laughter and excited exclamations came from the other side of the bedroom door.

Just then, the two boys burst out of the room, both with excited looks on their faces.

"Guess what, mommy!"

"Yeah, mama! Guess!"

The two women smiled at their sons and ventured to ask. They shared another private and amused moment when the two young boys' eyes lit up at the sound of their mothers' interest.

"What, Hayner? Seifer? You guys'll have to tell us cuz we're old and can't keep up."

"Well," Seifer proclaimed proudly, "when we get older, we're gonna get married and move into a biiig house with a biiig yard and Struggle all the time!"

After the initial shock of the almost out-of-thin-air explanation, the two mothers could barely stifle their giggles as they faked dismayed expressions on their faces. Seifer's mother suddenly began blinking rapidly, the fluttering of her eyelashes combined with an exaggerated roll of the eyes amusing the two young boys to no end.

"So you two will ride off into the sunset and leave us two poor old women alone at home with your silly fathers?"

Serra fake-swooned after the proclamation and fell over, her best friend catching her dramatically mid-fall. Lucia then fell to her knees, clutching her best friend's hands in false panic as the two of them lay on the floor.

"Oh, heavens! She's fainted! Hurry, Hayner darling! Hurry, save her!"

Hayner chuckled and blushed, half-hiding behind Seifer as he pulled the older boy back into the bedroom with him.

"Don't worry, mommy, we won't leave you guys. 'Sides, you're not _that_ old!"

With that, the two boys made their way back into the room, laughing about their mothers' antics, the two stood up and straightened their clothes. Serra turned to her best friend and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, bringing the other woman into a sweeping side hug.

"Looks like we had nothing to worry about, Lucia. They get along just fine."

"Yeah," she replied, resting her head on Serra's shoulder. "Yeah."

* * *

For every review received, I smile. :)

So that was it. Rinse and Repeat is finally over and all I can really say is that I've had such a great time writing it! Thank you guys so much for sticking with this story for so long. Actually, come to think of it, this story only took a month to write. I guess this was one of those lucky creations that really just took off the moment it hit the paper and pen... or maybe keyboard and screen in this case? -laughs-

**Explanation of Title **  
(_Because sometimes, you just need these kinds of things_)

Pretty much, the entire idea of the story was that during the two months that it took for Hayner to -finally- fall for Seifer, it was his process of cleansing his entire being of anything that had to do with Roxas save for their memories. After he was able to get rid of his feelings for Roxas, he could 'fall in love' again without anything holding him back.

I guess the whole thing with their first time being in the shower was a bit symbolic... holy shit! Symbolism inside of a yaoi fanfic? And Sephiroth is really a five-year-old girl! XD

Honestly, I've had a great time getting to know my fellow Seiner fangirls. Teehee. A special thanks to **FinalFallenFantasy**, **Ninny-na**, SugarCoatedMuffin, Bonfiore'sGirl, Kitsune'sTemari, BonneNuit, and **TheGlacierMist** for being amazing to no end and constantly leaving me excellent reviews. I thank everyone who alerted or favorited this fic and anyone who might've passed it on to their friends to read.

Honestly, I would love to write another Seiner fic some day, but right now I don't really have any inspiration. Regardless, keep your eyes peeled because I might come back with another Seiner one day! And I'll make sure the next one will be as epic as an uke SOLDIER on mako overdose! Or inversely epic from King Mickey showing up and ruining cutscenes all over the KH universe... yeah. That epic. :)

_Ne pas oublier cette histoire...  
Minikimii_


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